BY DR. SHARI FRISINGER
OVERCOMING CONFLICT IN THE WORKPLACE
LET’S DISCUSS WHY EVENTS CAN ESCALATE WITHOUT US REALIZING IT AND HOW TO GET ALONG WHEN SOMEONE IS BEING DIFFICULT, WHETHER THAT SOMEONE IS A COLLEAGUE, CREW MEMBER OR PART OF OUR FAMILY. MISCOMMUNICATION OCCURS FOR SEVERAL REASONS:
1. The words used are ambiguous. Sometimes, usually, soon and even always and never mean different things to different people. OK can mean either “I heard what you said” or “I agree with what you said.” This can lead to one person expecting action or a response whereas the other person believes the conversation is complete.
2. Some people will share many details while others prefer the CliffsNotes version. Listening to details that seemingly have no relevance to the story or its outcome can raise impatience and cause frustration. Does it really matter if someone was 15 minutes late or 20?
3. The people who need to connect with others can spend more time in small talk conversations than those who are comfortable sharing only work details. Not acknowledging the other person can lead to worry, anxiety concern and a general lack of productivity.
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HelicopterMaintenanceMagazine.com August | September 2019
4. Don’t assume that just because someone acted in a foolish or in an inappropriate manner (in your opinion) during the previous get together, they will act the same way this time. We might remember that last year, Joe came to work and took twice as long to complete his work because he was dreading going home to visitors. We will probably brace ourselves for the same type of behavior from Joe, and we can be guarded, wary or irritable. Who is to say that those visitors won’t be in town this year or that Joe has adjusted his attitude towards them? If we believe a family member judges our success against theirs (and their success includes more money, bigger house, newer car and other materialistic items), we are definitely doomed for an escalated discussion. In each of these scenarios, our reaction to the situation is just as critical as the other person’s. The firing of defense mechanisms becomes contagious and
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