My LBF Horace Bent
Owing to overwhelming—okay, moderate—public demand, the erstwhile custodian of the Organ of the Book Trade returns to guide you around the aisles at the London Book Fair...
Bent’s Notes T
O BLOOMSBURY’S OCTOBER Gallery for the Atlantic author part, where one of the main topics of discussion was that Will Atkinson1 has puppies. This isn’t a euphemism, or some obscure rights lingo, but the god’s honest: his cross-breed Margo has had a liter of the cutest litle things you’ll ever set your peepers on. How do I know? Because the indie’s staffers all seemed to be remarking on it with a dewy-eyed fond- ness, while the amount of time their boss took off to minister to Margo in her labours has taken on almost urban legend status. The longest estimate I heard was three full weeks of “caninernit leave”. Plus, Atkinson was collaring everyone walking by and showing them pics on his phone, including chairman Peter “David” Roche and Hellie Ogden2
,
who was waſting around Bloomsbury on a Vardø high aſter flogging yesterday’s front-page novel by Kiran Millwood Hargrave. Cue the “awwws” and this reporter’s subtle hint about adopting one— well, blurting out: “I need a puppy now!” Alas, the pooches are all spoken for. So far, so whole- some. But Margo’s motherhood was very much planned and Atkinson proceeded to talk, at some- what uncomfortable length, about the moment of conception and the logistics. The father of the brood, you see, was far smaller than Margo... and may have needed some human assistance. There are pictures. And video footage. Still, there was something fascinating and Atenborough-esque about the whole thing. If you want a gander at Atkinson’s animal husbandry, head over to stand 6E71 and ask to see the pics. He’d love to show you.
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This may seem like I have mentionitus, but I had another James Patterson moment today. On the Tube ride to Olympia, the carriage had an advert for the latest Paterson/Candice Fox book starring Harriet Blue, emblazoned with the tagline: “Meet the new Jack Reacher”. Which made me wonder how J-Patz’s famously large sense of self-worth copes with being compared to another writer in order to drive sales. Although, if nothing else the man is a clever-clogs in the marketing department, so maybe he dreamed it up himself. But props to Susan Sandon, PR maestro Char-
lotte Bush and all the folk at Century for building its magnificent Oval Office to promote Paterson’s latest collaboration-with-a-crime-writer-wannabe, The President is Missing. Bill Clinton3
1
, anyone? Me
neither. Throughout the day droves of people were eager to sit down and get a picture taken at the desk while pretending to pick up the phone and fire the special prosecutor who is investigating their illegal links with the Kremlin. Still, there are some unfortunate associations with the stand and Clinton’s heyday. The presi- dential office replica opened bang on 9 a.m., and by one minute past I’d heard a passer-by say: “The President is Missing, eh? He might just be in that cupboard with Monica Lewinsky”. One wag asked why the office had no cigar box or a replica of “that” dress. The 1990s... so different from today, eh?
If there’s something you would like to share with your old pal Horace (in the strictest confidence, naturellement...), email
horace.bent@
thebookseller.com or tweet @horacebent
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