MARCH 2020 • COUNTRY LIFE IN BC


49 The jig is up for Junkyard Frank’s love scheme


When we left off last time, Christopher and Ashley both had their turn at confronting Newt Pullman for having stood up their grandmother for dinner at the Seaside Rendezvous – an evening she ended up spending with a best- bibbed-and-tuckered Junkyard Frank. Rural Redemption, Part 120, continues ...


Woodshed


Chronicles by BOB COLLINS


Newt Pullman waited in the Henderson’s kitchen while Ashley went upstairs to tell Susan that he had asked to speak to her. Ashley excused herself when they returned, and Susan stood in the kitchen doorway. “Good morning, Susan.” “Ashley says you want to


see me. I have to wonder why you wouldn’t have bothered to see me last night?” “That makes two of us


then,” said Newt. “I had no idea you were expecting me to.”


“Of course, I was. The card,


the reservation. It all seemed perfect except the secret admirer stood me up.” “Are you sure about that?” “You weren’t there, were


you?” said Susan. “No, I wasn’t there. Ashley tells me you had dinner with Frank.” “Yes, I did. He saw me there waiting and offered to keep me company.” “Frank just happened to be at the Seaside Rendezvous Restaurant, did he?” “Apparently, yes. He said he


doesn’t go as often since his wife died.” “Who? Mil?” asked Newt.


“Mil’s not dead. She went home before her Mother passed 20 years ago and


never came back. Everyone wondered how she stayed with Frank as long as she did. If he’d bothered to take her to the Rendezvous even once in all their years together, she might still be here. He was all dressed up, too, I suppose?” Susan nodded. “Wearing a tie, was he?” Susan nodded again. “Let me guess.


Brown with ugly storks?”


Susan smiled. “You know the tie then?” “I know it. If


you see it once,


you’ll never forget it. I doubt if he has another one.” “Are you saying Frank is the


secret admirer?” asked Susan. “I’m saying FRANK is a conniving rat. Look, I’m sorry about last night. Let there be no secret that I do admire you, and it would be my pleasure to take you to dinner at the Seaside Rendezvous this very evening. Chris tells me you have a new dress I should see.” “Thank you for asking but


I’m worried about my reputation,” said Susan. Newt looked puzzled. “Oh, you know, same


woman, in the same dress, two days in a row with two different admirers. People might get the wrong idea about me. Let’s wait for a day or two.” “Okay. It wouldn’t do to be seen with a woman of ill repute. We’ll make it a celebration when we’re finished fixing the barn roof. I need to be on my way. We’re cutting the barn wood at Doug McLeod’s this afternoon and I’ve got some business to attend to before that.” Susan walked Newt to the back door. He turned toward her.


“Bye, Susan. I’m glad we got this mix-up sorted.”


“Me, too,” she said as she


kissed her fingertips and touched them to his lips. Ashley joined Susan as she stood in the doorway watching Newt go. “Grandma, you are seriously romantic.” “I don’t think so, Ashley, but thanks for saying so.” “Are you kidding me?


Kissing him with your fingers like that? Poor Mr. Pullman. It’s like shooting ducks in a barrel.” “Those would be fish in a


barrel; if we were shooting ducks they would be sitting. That was just a little sign of affection, that’s all.” “You know there was a


character in Lil Abner called Stupefyin’ Jones. I think I should start calling you Stupefyin’ Henderson.” Susan blushed. “And I’m going to start


calling you Far Too Cheeky.” vvv


Newt headed for the general store. He expected that Frank would be there drinking coffee in his usual spot. Newt parked beside Frank’s ancient wrecker and went inside. “Well, well, well. Look what


the cat’s dragged in, Lois,” called Frank from his table in the corner. “Maybe I’ll do Lois a favour and drag you right out of here, you back-stabbing rat.” “Ooooh, rat, eh? Is that the


best you can do, Pullman?” “I wouldn’t offend all these


folks by calling you what you really are.” “Maybe you’d like to go outside and say what’s really on your mind.” Lois stepped between


them. “Hang on, you two.


Nobody’s going outside. What on earth is all this foolishness about?”


“Beats me,” said Frank. “Pullman here seems to have


J.R. (Tim) Armstrong Memorial Bursary for Students in Agriculture or Journalism Programs


APPLICATION DEADLINE MARCH 16, 2020


Te Tim Armstrong Memorial Bursary is open to British Columbia students who are enrolled in their second year or higher of a full-time agriculture or journalism program at a university, institute or regional college in Canada.


See: http://www.bcfwa.ca/resources--links.html


Contact: Ronda Payne, Scholarship Chair ronda.eyben@shaw.ca


Proudly sponsored by the BC Farm Writers’ Association


CREDIT CARD # _________________________________________ EXP _______________ oNEW oRENEWAL | oONE YEAR ($18.90) oTWO YEARS ($33.60) oTHREE YEARS ($37.80)


MAIL TO 36 Dale Road


Enderby, BC V0E 1V4 subscriptions@countrylifeinbc.com


SUBSCRIBE NOW!


a burr of some kind under his saddle.” “How was your dinner last


night?” “It was just fine, thank you.


Why do you ask?” “Met someone for dinner,


did you?” asked Newt. “Don’t see that’s any business of yours, but yes I did. I joined a lady there because some fool stood her up.” “And just how is it she got


to thinking it was me?” “Funny, nobody mentioned


your name. I can see how you might of come to mind, though, if she was thinking about a fool.” “Don’t play the wise guy


Frank. You don’t fit the profile.” “Like you were sayin’, if


you’ve got a problem, we can see to it outside.” Lois banged her fist on the table so hard the salt and pepper shakers jumped in the air.


“If you two don’t stop this nonsense right now, I’m going to throw the pair of you outside myself. And if I do, neither one of you is going to be coming back in anytime soon. Is that clear? Nobody wants to hear any more of this, believe me.” “I wouldn’t mind hearin’ about it some more,” said Old Jimmy Vincent from the back of the store.


“Did I miss something?” asked Lois, looking from


Frank to Newt to Old Jimmy. “When did the government decide to make today Old Fools Day? Odd no one said anything about it. Now just give it a drink, all of you.” “Just hate to see an


opportunity get passed up is all,” said Jimmy. Lois sighed and rolled her


eyes. “Are you having one of those senior’s moments here, Jimmy, or do I need to phone for the ambulance?” “Nothing like that, Lois. It’s just these two seem like they’d like to settle their differences and I was thinkin’ if you could get them to hold off ‘til Friday night they could have-at-it down at the hall and the 4-H kids could sell tickets. I hear they’re trying to raise money to get to the PNE next summer,” chuckled Jimmy. Lois turned back to Frank and Newt. “There you go. We can start selling tickets right now. Unless the pair of you sit down and have a cup of coffee together and quit carrying on like a pair of bantam roosters.” The bell over the door


jingled. Harriet Murray from the paper walked in and noticed the sudden silence. “So, what’s new in here then? Anyone care to comment?”


... to be continued


Don’t miss a single issue of Country Life in BC!


Name Address City


Postal Code Phone


Email


Page 1  |  Page 2  |  Page 3  |  Page 4  |  Page 5  |  Page 6  |  Page 7  |  Page 8  |  Page 9  |  Page 10  |  Page 11  |  Page 12  |  Page 13  |  Page 14  |  Page 15  |  Page 16  |  Page 17  |  Page 18  |  Page 19  |  Page 20  |  Page 21  |  Page 22  |  Page 23  |  Page 24  |  Page 25  |  Page 26  |  Page 27  |  Page 28  |  Page 29  |  Page 30  |  Page 31  |  Page 32  |  Page 33  |  Page 34  |  Page 35  |  Page 36  |  Page 37  |  Page 38  |  Page 39  |  Page 40  |  Page 41  |  Page 42  |  Page 43  |  Page 44  |  Page 45  |  Page 46  |  Page 47  |  Page 48  |  Page 49  |  Page 50  |  Page 51  |  Page 52