SMART | city


(49 per cent) of all female murder victims in Canada are killed by a former or current intimate partner. Violence against women happens in all cultures and religions, in all ethnic and racial communities, at every age and in every income group. Sixty-seven per cent of Canadians personally know at


My mother: Te face of domestic violence O


Kevin Kline


n any given day, more than 3,300 women, along with their 3,000 children, sleep in an emergency shelter to escape domestic violence in Canada. About half


least one woman who was sexually or physically assaulted. Chances are a person close to you may be or has been a victim of domestic violence: A person you work with? A neighbour? A relative? Te person writing this column? Yes, I am what you would call a statistic, my Mother was murdered by her husband. I started sharing my story some time ago, hoping I could open people’s eyes and help make a difference. It’s no surprise our lives all changed the day she was taken from us, more than I ever acknowledged at the time and more than I ever accepted. But as the statistics indicate, I’m sadly not alone.


• • • • • My story starts with my mother, Joanne. Today would


have been her 71st birthday. She was a wonderful lady who worked a full-time job, took care of her three boys for many years on her own and went back to school in her early 40’s to fulfil her dream of becoming a nurse. She was the strong- est woman I knew. She was always there when we made a mistake in life to simply keep loving us and to teach us how to get back up. She always made us feel special, important and a part of a family. To me she was unstoppable … there were no barriers in this universe that could stop her. She taught us strength and to go after our dreams and make them happen. My mother, like all moms, was the tie that kept our family together. She made sure my brothers and I communicated even when distance kept us apart. I hear her voice often, reminding me that family is your “safe place,” a statement that became ironic when it was in her safe place that her life ended one September evening. It was a Sunday night. My brother had just left the house


for work, our youngest brother was out of town and I was at a hockey game hundreds of miles away. I now remember that night like it was yesterday, even though I locked it in my memory and threw away the key for many years. A few years after that night, I was in a federal prison boardroom, sitting less than 10 feet from my mother’s husband, who is


Joanne Kline.


also my mother’s murderer. I can’t explain the emotions and the questions. I do know that was when I awoke to the reality of what this man had done. It was as if the room in which I had locked all my memories burst open. It was the hidden pain caused by domestic violence. An example of that pain is the wedge it drove into my family. Tis was the first time since the trial that my brothers and I were together as a family. Ever since then it had been hard for us to meet. We never spoke of why, until that day, standing outside during a break so the man who murdered our mom could get a coffee. The parole board asked him to talk about what hap-


pened and what caused it. Tey revealed his past abuse on partners, which we weren’t aware of. Each time, his abuse became worse — it started with shoving a girlfriend, then pushing his first wife, then punching her. Tat relationship ended but his pattern continued until finally he took a life … my mom’s life. I learned that day she previously had called the police about his abuse. She had even gone to a shelter on a few occasions for some peace when my brothers left the house for a weekend or a school trip. She never told us but then again we never asked. We, like most of society, were blind to the signs, or simply ignored them. My mother was living in fear, just as thousands of women are doing right now. Te reasons she went back are very similar for all the women who have done likewise — fear of survival, fear of being unable to provide a home for their children, and sadly,


fear of what would happen if they spoke out and told others, even their own families. Nobody ever wants to think about the subject of domestic abuse. Nobody wants to admit to it, because of fear of their abusive partner and fear of what the community will think of them. I never wanted to tell anyone because of what they might think of me. I had my own fam- ily and still, I felt this way. Imagine how a young child must feel, one who is afraid to go to bed, a child who sleeps to the sounds of yelling or glasses breaking. Who do they turn to? Who do they call for help? Te pattern begins — to hide the pain and learn to live with it. My brother told me of a simple sentence that continues to


haunt him. He told me one night he and my mom were talk- ing before he went to bed. She apologized for the yelling he witnessed earlier and as she walked out the door my brother asked her, “Will you be OK?” To that she replied, “Yes, I sleep with one eye open … love you.” Tis is how she lived every day, as do hundreds and thousands of women now. I can assure you all children of domestic violence feel the


same, no matter their age, financial status or education. Tey feel as my brothers and I all felt — it’s our fault. I was the oldest, I should have done something, I should have seen the signs. It was harder for my brother. He left the house that night for his part-time job even though my mom asked him to stay for supper. “Just stay and eat with us,” she said. He couldn’t stop himself from thinking if only he had said yes to supper at home. Over the years I have had to sit through parole hearings and hear about my mother’s death time and time again, hear her killer claim it was her fault she made him angry, hear how he paid his debt to society. What I never hear is my mom.


• • • • • Sadly, the statistics show my story is not special. It’s time


to talk about domestic violence. We must stand up and tell the hundreds of thousands of women and especially children affected by domestic violence that it’s OK to ask for help, that it’s OK to talk about it, that they can tell us and we’ll help them and make sure they’re safe, and most importantly, that we won’t judge them. Domestic violence is real. It has an impact on generations and it’s a problem in our city, province, and country. Another shelter is not the fix for all of domestic violence. Tougher punishment, greater community support, education and reducing the victims’ fear of public perception are all parts of the solution. Te only way for that to happen is to stand up and make your voice heard on this subject. Kevin Kline is the CEO of MyToba.ca and the former Pub- lisher of the Winnipeg Sun.


Te City of Human Rights Education I


t is not only possible; Stuart Murray is determined to make this happen. Stuart Murray is the former CEO pf the Canadian


Museum for Human Rights, from 2009 to 2014, steering the project from conception to construction completion. During his tenure, he developed a passion for the issues that govern how we treat one another and for protecting those inalienable enti- tlements we hold as human beings. Stuart also learned that Win-


Bold Ideas Dorothy Dobbie


nipeg is home to a host of or- ganizations and institutions that already contribute to these ideals: Te Mauro Centre for Peace and Justice, University of Winnipeg’s Global College, University of Man- itoba’s Centre for Human Rights Research, Rotary International’s World Peace Partners, and the Canadian Mennonite University’s Peace and Conflict Transforma- tion Studies program to name just a few. As well, more than a dozen Winnipeg schools have earned


UNESCO recognition for their commitment to human rights education. Complementing all this activity is the Internation- al Peace Garden that straddles the Manitoba-North Dakota border in the Turtle Mountains and has traditionally been a location for peace and reconciliation among First Nations. Human rights and peace: do they equate? Te answer is


yes. You cannot have peace without recognition of human rights. Recognition of human rights invariably leads to peace. Stuart recognizes this. He is also inspired by the many


home grown individuals who have shown international leadership on this file: people such as Gail Asper, Senator Murray Sinclair, the Hon. Lloyd Axworthy, human rights lawyer David Matas the list is long and illustrious. Putting aside all the warm and fuzzy reasons for doing this,


there is a hard edged economic logic behind it, too. In 2016, world travel and tourism generated $7.2 trillion, almost 10 percent of the global GDP. David Scowsill, President of the World Travel and Tourism


Council, commented in his 2016 report: “(Te) Travel and Tourism sector is expected to grow faster than the wider economy and many other industries over the next decade. It is anticipated to support over 370 million jobs by 2026. Such strong growth will require tourism destinations across the


4 Smart Biz As Canadians, we take pride in our


history and look forward to our future as the true north, strong and free. From our earliest days, we have always come to- gether to advance our common purpose, each of us ready to do our part to move Canada forward, using our diversity to make Canada’s social fabric stronger. This year, Canadians from coast to


coast to coast will use 2017 as a year to celebrate our 150th Anniversary. Canada has a long history of striving


to respect diversity and the rule of law; it is a place with high standards for itself and for others. At times we have failed, and at times we have triumphed. Our human rights history is a critical part of our character as a nation. One of the op- portunities I see with Canada celebrat- ing the 150th anniversary is to recognize and honour our history – to cultivate respect and gratitude for our inherit- ance of the rights that others fought to protect and to have recognized. We must look at where we started as a


nation – where we find ourselves today and where do we want to be tomorrow. Our human rights history is our common history; it is at the base of our identity as Canadians. We have many stories to tell – some well-known, some less familiar – and these stories can unite us as a country and to ultimately inspire this generation, and the generations to follow, to affirm and protect these rights and freedoms. Our human rights history is not blem-


ish-free; trail-blazing is never without its misgivings or mistakes. For example, we should recognize that many Canadians, even these 150th anniversary celebra- tions will not be viewed in the same way by all people – for many Aboriginal communities, this is not necessarily an event that warrants celebration. But by looking honestly and openly at our past, by engaging a diversity of voices and perspectives, and by celebrating what has been accomplished to overcome these mistakes, we will serve to make


world to provide environments that are conducive to busi- ness development.” Currently in Manitoba, it is reported that tourism is a


$1.5 billion industry. Te opening of the Canadian Museum for Human Rights three years ago has given local tourism a major boost, but as with all museums, programming to stimulate a continued reason to visit is a critical part of the ongoing health of the organization. Taking advantage of all the existing synergies surrounding human rights, peace and justice just makes sense for our town. To this end, Stuart has created an organization called


City of Human Rights Education. He has recruited the Hon. Lloyd Axworthy and the distinguished Arthur Mauro and to co-chair the initiative. He has gathered together some of the best thinkers and influential players in the city to begin the


www.smartbizwpg.com


What if Winnipeg could become the city where everyone interested in human rights came to learn about this issue as a stepping stone to international understanding and world peace?


Stuart Murray’s thoughts


our nation more united, more proud, and more just. We can use this anniversary to continue on a journey of reconciliation. The foundation that equalizes the con-


versation amongst all of us is education. Education is the common denominator that allows us to engage in a conversa- tion that nurtures and celebrates our differences rather than drives us in opposite directions. Through education we have seen much progress. Arguably, there has been progress in the area of gender rights, the rights of women, or the rights of the disabled to name a few. But in the same breath, it is abundantly clear that there is more to do on this journey. The issue of Education allows us to advance the pace of progress. In it’s most grounded form, the City


of Human Rights Education allows for that conversation, that understanding, that education to take place in a city and province that is rich in the pursuit of peace, justice and human rights; Win- nipeg, Manitoba, Canada.


dialogue on how to take this idea to fruition. After countless personal meetings and luncheons, this group met March 24 to learn more and to help chart the next step. Tis should be a no-brainer for Winnipeg. Te city is just


the right size – large enough to be interesting and to provide many amenities, but not too large to be intimidating and al- ienating. As a city, we can make things happen through our close relationships – it is often said in Winnipeg that there is only one degree of separation. Right now, we are at the dialogue stage. If human rights is


central to our identity as Canadians, then bringing together people from around the world to explore the nuances in that inspiring building we have dreamed and made real is simply the natural next step. It’s a bold idea, Stuart Murray, and we will make it happen.


May 2017


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