BERNIE
By Bernie Siegel, MD
walked with God and there were, therefore, always two sets of footprints. At a time of great diffi culty the man noticed only one set of footprints and complained to God that He was not there when he needed Him most, God replied, “I was carrying you during the diffi cult times and that is why there was only one set of footprints.”
I One day after a big snowstorm I was jogging through the
deep snow and really struggling to make my way. I realized how much of a struggle it was to have to make your own way with no plowed path or footsteps to follow. The next day it was much easier. The snow was still soft and my footprints were easy to fol- low. Five days later the snow had frozen and the rigid ice made it dangerous for me to try and fi t into the old footprints. I had to create a new path or risk breaking my ankles.
What I learned from all this is that at different times in my life I must make different choices. At times it is all right to be carried, at other times following in the footsteps of others is appropriate, at others to make your own way and at times it is proper to leave the old ways and start a fresh path. Your way is found by what feels right for you and not by looking for the easy way.
You must remember that if you constantly follow in the steps
of others you will lose your way and life. Remember their way can at times endanger you and be the wrong way. So fi nd your way and let them go theirs. True natives can be your guide when they have shared the same experience but be wise in choosing your guides and do not follow those who are not true guides and teachers but dictate their way to you. Follow their way and you will be lost forever.
6 Essential Living Maine ~ March/April 2015
n this issue I would like to reveal to you the advantages of footsteps and amnesia. Let me begin with footsteps. I am sure most of you are aware of the story about the man who
Now let me grow less philosophical and more practical as I
tell you about my experience with amnesia. Several years ago af- ter doing some work on our roof I stepped onto my ladder and the top rung broke. I fell onto the pavement and struck my head hard enough to give me a concussion. I awakened to a lovely woman bending over me asking, “Honey are you all right?”
“Why are you calling me Honey?” “I’m your wife.” Well I felt quite fortunate to have such an attractive wife.
She then introduced me to the fi ve children who were standing nearby. It turns out they were ours and all quite nice. I had amne- sia, due to the fall, and that was why everyone seemed so nice. I couldn’t remember the problems they caused yesterday. My mar- riage was great. I got along with the kids fabulously and every- thing was going very well until my memory returned. Then I had to go into psychotherapy and marriage counseling.
Fortunately I had a great therapist who taught me that there
was something better than amnesia for relationships. She said it would make me blind to some things as amnesia did but had many other assets. What do you think she taught me about?
If you want a hint try reading I Corinthians 13 or “The Prac-
tice of Love” by Ashley Montagu. Yes, she taught me that love had all the benefi ts of amnesia but also offered many more benefi ts to the giver and receiver of the love. Please be sure the love you give is unconditional or “kill ‘em with kindness” is not simply a way of overpowering your enemies by loving them but can destroy the lives of others by your forcing your love and will upon them. This conditional love is no different then following the wrong foot- steps imposed upon you by others. That is not love. Love clears the way but does not tell you which way to go.
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