*Every year, more than 3 mil- lion children witness domes- tic violence in their homes.


Domestic violence affects


every member of the family, including the children. Family violence creates a home envi- ronment where children live in constant fear. Children who witness fam-


ily violence are affected in ways similar to children who are physically abused.. They are often unable to establish nurturing bonds with either parent Children are at greater risk for abuse and neglect if they live in a violent home. Statistics show that over 3


million children witness vio- lence in their home each year. Those who see and hear violence in the home suffer physically and emotionally. "Families under stress pro- duce children under stress. If a spouse is being abused and there are children in the home, the children are af- fected by the abuse."


Dynamics of domestic vio- lence are unhealthy for chil- dren:  Control of family by one dominant member.


 Abuse of a parent.  Isolation.  Protecting the "family se- cret.".


Children react to their en- 22


vironment in different ways, and reactions can vary de- pending on the child's gender and age. Children exposed to family violence are more likely to develop social, emo- tional, psychological and or behavioral problems than those who are not. Recent research indicates that chil- dren who witness domestic violence show more anxiety, low self esteem, depression, anger and temperament problems than children who do not witness violence in the home. The trauma they ex- perience can show up in emo- tional, behavioral, social and physical disturbances that effect their development and can continue into adulthood.


Some potential effects: Emotional  Grief for family and per- sonal losses.


 Shame, guilt, and self blame.


 Confusion about conflict- ing feelings toward par- ents.


 Fear of abandonment, or expressing emotions, the unknown or personal in- jury.


 Anger.  Depression and feelings of helplessness and power- lessness.


 Embarrassment.


Behavioral  Acting out or withdraw- ing.


 Aggressive or passive.  Refusing to go to school.  Care taking; acting as a parent substitute.


 Lying to avoid confronta- tion.


 Rigid defenses.  Excessive attention seek- ing.


 Bedwetting and night- mares.


 Out of control behavior.  Reduced intellectual com- petency.


 Manipulation, depend- ency, mood swings.


Social  Isolation from friends and relatives.


 Stormy relationships.  Difficulty in trusting, espe- cially adults.


 Poor anger management and problem solving skills.


 Excessive social involve- ment to avoid home.


 Passivity with peers or bullying.


 Engaged in exploitative relationships as perpetra- tor or victim.


Physical  Somatic complaints, headaches and stomach- aches.


 Nervous, anxious, short attention span.


 Tired and lethargic.


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