Round Table
made me question my beliefs. SP: Yes to both. But I don’t tell them what to think, but try to help them learn how to think. Also, pointing out that Gran was a Christian and a very good person helped. Most importantly, I hope I have given them the tools to think for themselves, finding their own conclusions and paths. Encouraging them to do science was crucial, and science has always been a staple of our conversation. M: My only child, Ada, is approaching eleven months, so I haven’t yet, but I hope I will in due course talk generally and openly about the virtues which enhance or detract from a person’s way of being. I imagine such discussion might sensibly include the moral framework which underpins various world religions. EA: Yes, we talk to both our girls about religion, and about the fact that we’re a humanist family. The oldest is eight and a half, so obviously she can handle more complex conversations than the four year old, and she also sees and hears a lot more about religion when she’s off at school or with friends. My approach is simple: I tell her that many people believe different things about what happens when you die, and that many people believe in a god or gods, but that those explanations don’t work for me and Daddy. We prefer to use scientific evidence to try to understand the world. We do try to make them aware
that religion can be a controversial subject, and that you need to always be respectful when discussing other people’s beliefs. It’s also important to me to let the girls know that although we call ourselves a humanist family, they don’t have to share our feelings,
www.humanism-scotland.org.uk
and we would not be disappointed in them if, at some point, they decided they believed in God. I have an eleven year old who has
is interested in human psychology so asks a lot of questions about religion. He is very comfortable with his atheism and doesn’t consider a lack of religion to be in anyway lacking in life. He values his own perspectives and gives a lot of weight to the reasoning behind them. We discuss religion quite a lot and always leave it open that he may one day find he may interact with it differently than he does now. His Gran is a priest in the Church of England and so he can access different views on a personal level.
3. Do your immediate and extended family have humanist ceremonies at weddings, funerals and for the birth of a child (for example, naming ceremonies)? If so, what is your experience of these ceremonies? And how do you feel attending traditional religious ceremonies as a humanist?
MJ: My father requested and had a humanist funeral (in 2010) and my mother also wants that when her time comes. My uncle, my father’s younger brother, had a humanist funeral last month.
Anon Mum: No. We are happy to attend religious ceremonies, but find a lot of what they say irrelevant. Sometimes it’s sad when you’re told at a funeral nothing but that you are going to hell. BR: Yes, we do, from weddings to renewal of vows to funerals as a family we are more inclined to have
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