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reer erupted into a triumphant exclamation: “It’s not Larry, it’s you! Can’t you see? Every time your husband tries to speak you jump in with scorn and criticism. You are the one who has stolen his voice!”


There are only a few times in my life when someone has looked directly at me with eyes of hatred and rage; this was one such time. The wife was furious. How dare I accuse her of being the cause of her husband’s prob- lems? Little was said in the dying moment of the session. If I remember correctly, I left them with a communication skills work- sheet. Their departure from the session was


cold and hasty. My supervisor had lots to say during our post-session debrief, though the one thing that stood out was this: “I don’t think they are coming back.” And they didn’t. I am fond of sharing this therapeutic misstep with students and typically do so just at the moment they are certain they have figured out the “true cause” of their client’s prob- lem. I have come to learn that any such truth ought to be cradled with tentative arms, knowing that the imposition of our truths upon an expecting client can have anything but the intended effect. And this I know to be true(ish).


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