Boring & the Vulgar society at large and a mortgage market in flux
“The tedium of PPI claims work is now regularly relieved by The Outlaw telling them to go fuck themselves”
Photo © Allan Warren Cummings: starring in Skyfall
“Our Orwellian FSA last year paid a million pounds to headhunters. Unbelievable”
position. He is beginning to resemble the old guy down at Sainsbury’s who man- fully struggles to collect the trolleys from the car park on a T ursday night. Another bad move is Andrew Flintoff ’s
intention to take up boxing. Freddie’s nar- cissism and hubris has alienated him from many in the cricket world and it won’t be long before he receives a good shoeing.
A
nd so to the Peter Cummings debacle and HBOS. T e picture above tellingly frames this man
and I fully expect him to be performing a reprise of the Donald Pleasance villain from earlier Bond fi lms in the upcoming Skyfall. Whilst Cummings clearly had a self-
righteousness that exceeded any reserves of good judgement the real villains in this story are Messers Hornby and Cros-
www.mortgageintroducer.com Photo © surreynews via flickr Boris Johnson: Wouldn’t last 10 minutes
by who were not even censured in the regulator’s report. Hornby is still in the casino business – he’s the gaff er at Coral Bookmakers where his skills as a retailer might be more appropriately utilised than they were at the country’s proudest banking institution. Even more ironic is the fact that aſt er
deſt ly vacating the scene of the mess at HBOS Crosby turned up at yes, you guessed it, the FSA as a non-executive director. You actually couldn’t make all of this up. Incidentally our Orwellian FSA last
year paid a million pounds to headhunt- ers. Unbelievable. Back to the lenders. Leeds, Accord and
Nationwide are providing some super lending but please can somebody within each of these look more critically at the service levels and fi nd a way of bringing some improvements?
selected networks and one in particular. T is network has signed up some new accounts and is puffi ng its chest out vir-
T
he Outlaw has become fatigued by the recent re-emergence of “please join us” propaganda from
tue of the fact that its parent is blessed with capital resources to throw life vests to struggling businesses. What it fails to do is explain why more than a handful of its strongest businesses have leſt in recent years citing an over-prescriptive and in- fl exible approach. What a croc. In other news the lives and usefulness
of Geri Halliwell, Tulisa and Boris John- son are grossly over-hyped and let’s be frank, the latter wouldn’t last ten minutes as the leader of a coalition government in such strenuous conditions. Equally the whole subject of
social
media and twitter usage is becoming te- dious. T e Outlaw’s own opinion is that concepts such as facebook and twitter are the preserve of people embellishing and promoting their own self-serving sound- bites about their fl awed lives. Just get a genuine life and live it. In privacy please. Nobody is interested. However,
the fi nal rant this month
goes to staff at the PPI claims company which calls T e Outlaw at home every Friday evening with an estimate of his unclaimed compensation. T e tedium of these people’s work is now regularly relieved by T e Outlaw telling them to go fuck themselves whilst calmly slam- ming down the phone and sipping from a fi ne glass of burgundy. T is now gets my weekends off to the most satisfying start you can imagine. Not as pleasurable as very good sex. But a genuine “exhale” experience. Try it.
MORTGAGE INTRODUCER OCTOBER 2012 25
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