Weesie and Richard (“Pete”) Hollis Amory, MO Married since 1952 Weesie: Togetherness Matters. “For as long as we’ve been married‚ we’ve always done things together. When our kids were young‚ we’d make doing things as a family a priority‚ especially sitting down at the dinner table together to share stories about our day. Now‚ we do a lot of things together as a couple‚ like playing golf‚ going fishing‚ or just spending time together.”
Pete: Little Things Mean a Lot. “It’s important to keep doing all those little things you said and did when you were dating‚ and never let your spouse forget how much you love them. It’s things like saying‚ ‘I love you’ and ‘thank you.’ Complimenting
Michelle Braverman Houston, TX Married to Alan Braverman since 1968 The Power of Laughter. “I’m often asked (in my exalted position as unofficial den mother to a group of 20-somethings)‚ “How do you know if he’s ‘the one’ ?” And I always ask back‚ “Does he make you laugh?” If he can make you laugh‚ especially in the middle of a fight‚ then he’s the one. A shared sense of humor—from puns to comic strips to just the way you see the world—is priceless.” It’s Okay to Spend Time Apart.
“We do have ‘date nights’ but we don’t call them that. I feel like it’s a date whenever we go out. We may each go to a different movie at the multiplex that night‚ but it’s still a date. He’s my favorite traveling companion‚ but we can split up during the day—the pool and reading
your spouse often‚ kissing her‚ a bunch of wildflowers for no special reason . . . just because.” Maintain a United Front.
“If you have differences when dealing with your children‚ always discuss them privately rather than in front of your kids. You always want to maintain a united front‚ even if you don’t necessarily agree. And if you do have differences‚ always meet your spouse much more than halfway.” Stay Physically Close. “When
I would travel for business‚ I would joke that Weesie was like my American Express card. I wouldn’t leave home without her. Even something as where you sleep is important. You need to sleep together in the same bed‚ and not a king-sized one. A double or queen- sized bed is better because you need to feel your spouse next to you.”
a pile of newspapers for him‚ crawling through every boutique for me. Accept Your Differences. “It’s
figuring out who the other person is and not pushing that person to become someone he isn’t. Most of us get married for the right reasons‚ but people change and grow continuously. If you’re lucky‚ you will grow and change in ways (big and small) that dovetail with and respect each other. Alan was really a ‘life of the party’ guy when we first met‚ and I was quite shy. Now I am more likely to be the social butterfly and he the observer in social situations. There is also a bit of accepting what you know won’t change and being grateful for this person who will actually put up with you. Football may always be ‘the other woman’ in our marriage‚ but he will never ever hint that maybe I just don’t need more clothes/ shoes/books/nail polish.”
SPRING / SUMMER 2012 pause 21
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