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N MARCH 2008, I found myself, along with my wife, sitting in the Ministerial Care office with Dr. Bill Leonard, our lives in shambles. Life had been great, our family was great (so I thought), min- istry was great, but I did not realize that I had been slowly crumbling. I had let my guard down but ignored it until it was too late. I had believed a lie from the Enemy. I had resolved that this couldn’t or wouldn’t happen to me. I was too strong for this. I was respected, and my family was dependent on me.
Sarah* and I sat there that day as casualties of an extramarital affair that I had committed. I had failed not only God and my family, but I had also left people we love in major trauma. I felt like my life was over. I was struggling with depression, anger, suicidal thoughts, and hopelessness. Sarah was devastated, heart- broken, and in disbelief.
Would we ever be able to rebuild trust? Would our marriage survive? Would my sons survive the fact that their father, mentor, and priest had let them down? On top of all that, how could God ever use me again? We had no jobs, no hope, no direction, and it seemed like no future. We had to move. But where would we go? I couldn’t get us into a house because we no longer had an income.
Our house sold the next day! It had not even been listed on the market, yet in a stagnant economy we had a contract within three hours of the buyers coming forward.
Two weeks later, we moved to Cleveland, Ten- nessee, to enter
the restoration program offered through the Center for Ministerial Care. We had our family, a few possessions, and shat- tered dreams. We began intense counseling with Dr. Leonard and started the process of putting some of the pieces of our lives back together. We didn’t know what the future held, but we knew we needed help. Our circumstances seemed almost impossible, but then the miracles began. The first week of counseling, we were both delivered from things we had struggled with for most of our lives. This did not make it an easy road for the rest of the process, but it was the beginning of hope.
Without income, we were able to secure a home for lease with no penalty. Shortly thereafter, we were both offered jobs in fields that we weren’t qualified for. God began to bless our marriage with a greater level of unity than we had ever experienced. Sarah and I had been in ministry for years, but I never really understood the love, mercy, and grace of God until I saw it through her. Really!
We met with Dr. Leonard every month and began to rebuild our mar- riage. I didn’t care if I ever stood in the pulpit again as long as my family was intact. The months continued and the restoration became more and more evi- dent. Being brutally honest and detailed with Sarah was not easy for either of us, but it provided a foundation of trust and the beginning of healing. It seemed very slow in the beginning, but as the healing continued, time moved forward speedily. Because of the Lord and the Center for Ministerial Care, we are living examples of God’s redemption and grace. Sarah and I are no longer prisoners of the past but preparers for the future. Depression, fear, and suicidal thoughts are gone! Trust and hope have been restored! Our marriage is rebuilt, with our love for each other stronger than it’s ever been. Our two sons are stronger, and our family is stronger. I have never been more excit- ed about my relationship with Sarah and what the future holds for us and our boys. Because of redemption, grace, mercy, love, forgiveness, and restoration, we are planting a new church in Florida. Praise God! I am forever grateful for a second chance. We are living proof that God still works miracles.
If you are dealing with immorality or failure, help is available for you. Please get help! God can change your life. Contact the Center for Ministerial Care by calling 1-800-762-5656 or emailing cmcare2@
churchofgod.org.
*Sarah is a ficti- tious name.
EVANGEL • APR 2010 25
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