ADVENTIST HISTORY
bondslave,” as if her wishes and plans did not matter (Letter 174a, 1903; Letter 47, 1904; Letter 45, 1904). In her rebuke, White asked Walter: “What do you suppose
your wife married you for? – To be trained by you, and dictated to, and compelled to obey your wishes?” (Letter 47, 1904). She asserted that Florence had a right to make her own judgment calls, to care for her family, and to ask for financial support from her husband. She also agreed that Florence could oppose Walter’s
At the same time White was rebuking Walter, she was sending
letters of love and sympathy to his wife. She encouraged Florence that her duty was to go and care for her mother, adding that leaving was not breaking the covenant of marriage. In her final letter to Florence, White advised her not to return to Walter, since the marriage would bring her the same unhappiness as in the past. She even offered Florence a job working in the sanitarium aſter she finished caring for her mother (Letter 148, 1907).
In the context of this real-life situation, we can sense that Ellen White understood the inherent messiness of Christian marriages and relationships.
plans if she thought them not in harmony with God’s will. In 1904, Florence leſt Walter to spend time with her mother
and take care of her grandfather. When Walter sent White a letter pleading with her to ask his wife to return, she replied that she would not honor his request until he produced evidence of spiritual change. Knowing Walter’s propensity to call his wife crazy for leaving him, White sternly warned the man: “Never, never leave on her mind the slightest impression that she is in any way inclined to insanity. If she be, it is you who are responsible” (Letter 45, 1904).
Stupidity and Pride One of the lessons to be gleaned from this story is that Ellen White saw a difference between stupidity and pride. Stupidity prompted a young man to castrate himself because of
a misinterpretation of Scripture. Pride led countless husbands to selfishly engage in sexual intercourse without concern for their spouse’s or children’s well-being. Stupidity caused a man to mismanage money. Pride motivated
the same man to purposefully withhold money from his wife. Stupidity convinced a woman to allow one church’s opinion
of her spouse to control her view of him. Pride drove a man to become so controlling of his spouse that she could not do anything without his consent. While stupidity can be forgivable, pride is oſten more
harmful—and it led to the demise of Walter Harper’s marriages. We oſten see Ellen White’s counsel idealized in the form
of a quote extracted from a closely scrutinized book, yet in the context of this real-life situation, we can sense that she understood the inherent messiness of Christian marriages and relationships. Her realism offers us the chance to also be authentic and honest about our flaws and the stupidity and pride found in our own stories. Te next time a problem has you rushing to your Spirit of
Prophecy collection to find a quote, I would suggest that you take time to comb through her advice in the real-life scenarios she faced as a pastor and counselor for the Adventist movement.
14 AD VENTIS T T OD A Y
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