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even have any underwear! How would you like to go to school naked? I need some clothes. HELP.


Your naked friend, Peach Crayon7


MAROON CRAYON Dear Duncan,


Not sure if you remember me. My name is MAROON CRAYON. You only colored with me once, to draw a scab, but whatever. Anyway, you LOST me two years ago in the couch, then your Dad sat on me and BROKE ME IN HALF! I never would have survived had paperclip not nursed me back to health. I’m finally better, so come get me! And can Paper Clip come too? He’s really holding me together.


Sincerely, Your marooned crayon, Maroon Crayon8


I could go on and on, but you get the point. (Seriously. Go to Barnes and Noble and read these books!) So now we’re all giggling, and maybe you’ve forgotten that this talk is about diversity, equity, access, and inclusion.


So, let’s take the case of white crayon. “If it wasn’t for the outline, you wouldn’t even know I was there. It leaves me feeling…empty.”9


What white crayon is describing what it


feels like to be rendered invisible. One of my music educa- tion students once wrote in a paper for my Contemporary Issues in Music Education class that “Coming to the United States without speaking any English was one of the most impacting experiences I have lived – both negatively and positively. I was one of those kids ticketed as ESL and seen as remedial. Tis took away many opportunities for me, especially in my elective courses. I was denied the opportu- nity to participate in music classes because I was required to take extra “core curriculum classes to make up for the fact that I had the equivalent of a language deficiency – a language barrier.”10


Many of my students for whom English


is not their primary language have reported feeling invisible in their K-12 education experience; relegated to the back of their section in ensembles, or blatantly ignored in class. White crayon feels empty because it feels invisible.


Ten there’s pink crayon – on a personal crusade to call out and challenge gendered norms and traditional notions of masculinity and femininity with its plea for pink dinosaurs, cowboys, or monsters every once in a while. How do the dynamics of gendered expectations play out in music edu- cation? From choosing instruments and the seemingly ever enduring notion that flute is for girls, to the use of tradition- al masculinity to recruit more male voices into choir, (Come


7


Another one of my students who once said this in class: “Well, I really used to like to cover different pop songs. I’d sing and play guitar and record it and put it up on YouTube. And I really liked doing that. But once I became a music major and became friends with some professors on Face- book, I just stopped doing that.” Tese peach crayons can’t leave the box because they’re embarrassed by the musical practices they love because they don’t oſten count as “real music” or “serious music” in our profession.


And finally, marooned crayon. Te one that was barely giv- en a chance, forgotten, and then broken in half. In the last teaching job that I had before moving to higher ed, I was a middle school band director. I also taught a cycle course of group guitar that met every other day for one marking peri- od. As one marking period ended, my students were asking me about my next cohort. I ran down the roster of their peers’ names and was interrupted by a gasp of horror as I read who I’ll call “Bobby”’s name. “DOCTOR SEARS!” they exclaimed with dismay, “HE’S THE WORST KID IN THE ENTIRE SCHOOL!” Te worst kid in the entire school. He was failing all of his classes and spent more time in deten- tion or in school suspension than in class. Based on the description his peers had provided, I was fully anticipating a combative, explosive personality to burst into my class-


on! Join the choir! You’ll be with lots of girls!); to the text of vocal music that privileges heterosexual love and oſten reinforces traditional gendered expectations; to the severe lack of females in secondary music positions – particular- ly in the instrumental world (and especially in band); to the #MeToo movement that has rocked the classical music scene and now the music education world as well. Tere is certainly no lack of gender equity issues to call out and challenge in our profession.


Peach crayon. While I find the lack of paper wrapping and its subsequent nakedness hilarious, the bottom line is that peach crayon is too embarrassed to be seen, because it isn’t getting what it needs. In this case, underwear, at the very least. Each year I interview prospective students for admis- sion to our music education program here at TCNJ. And each year, something like this happens:


Me: Nice to meet you! Tell me a little about yourself and what you do musically. Applicant: Well, I’m in the band, the choir, the orchestra, I made regions, I’m section leader, and I uhummnnn…(whispers) I play in a rock band. Me: I’m sorry, what was that last part? Applicant: (barely audible) I play in rock band… Me: Again? Applicant: (Finally, louder) I play in a rock band. Me: A ROCK BAND! THAT’S SO AWESOME!


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