to communicate and let you know their whereabouts. Establish a texting code. “Need help now” or “NHN” is a quick and safe method to get to them in unexpected situations. Make them aware that you are easily accessible and nearby in case of emergencies.


Be fair and willing to compromise


regarding spending at the mall. Identify if the mall visit is for shopping, meeting friends or both. Discuss an amount of money needed to make the shopping experience enjoyable. Determining a set spending amount may discourage shoplifting and may also discourage hasty shopping habits that are usually easily influenced by friends. Before deciding if your teen is ready to hang out in the mall unaccompanied by an adult, encourage one-on-one discussions of the conse- quences of shoplifting and be ready to enforce an appropriate consequence, if required. Discuss reasonable pricings and make certain your teen understands the differences between planned and un- planned purchases, so as not to develop patterns of impulsive shopping. Allow independence and don’t be over- ly intrusive. Every child needs to develop


a sense of mastery and self-sufficiency. It is by design that teens must gain the con- fidence to be able to stand on their own. As demanding as it is to watch teens grow and develop, it is crucial to their well- being and relationships with others that you honor their growing independence. When teens are held back, they may become rebellious. Teens will be more likely to appreciate you when you monitor their safety while guiding them towards independence — sometimes actively and sometimes by getting out of the way. So, disregard your feelings of insignifi- cance when your teen disinvites you to the mall; compromise instead. Head to the mall together, but split up as soon as you get there so you can do your shopping while your teen hangs out with friends. Set a time to meet so you can drive home together. Use the drive home to talk about your teen’s interests and activities at the mall, but remain nonintrusive. This is the successful plan for parental monitoring at the mall.


Tamara Hill, MSN, DNPc, CPNP-AC, is an acute care PNP at the University of Mary- land Medical Center.


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