To the authorities this case was a real humdinger but, as luck would have it, Simon had seen one such wild-haired character at this very pub only days before. I guess that’s of the perks to living among the dregs of society, you always know where the bad guys are. As further luck would have it, the suspect himself was at the bar that very night.
Simon knew better than to confront him and would wait until the man left the bar and then tail him back to whatever hole it was that he had crawled out of.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - S
imon’s head hit the wall with a resounding BOOM. Spitting out blood and quickly checking for any loose teeth, Simon turned back toward his adversary. For a guy with a ridiculous haircut, this knuckledragger packed quite a punch.
The walk from the bar had been fairly uneventful and Simon had kept to the shadows, stalking his prey undetected. Or so he thought. Upon entering the warehouse, Simon found himself alone in a large room, empty save for a strange contraption.
Upon further inspection, Simon found the Maltese Reindeer was rigged up to said contraption and a strange light hung in the air next it. Simon wasn’t a scientist, but he deduced the light wasn’t natural. This couldn’t be the mystic Christmas magic the lady-in-distress had mentioned... could it?
Simon didn’t have time to figure it out. Blindsided by a forcefully swung two-by-four, he found himself knocked to the floor. He whipped out his trusty six-shooter only to have it kicked away by the angry goon, seconds before the thug socked him right in the jaw, sending him spinning into the wall.
“Wait, what is all that?” Simon asked as he shook his head, desperately trying to buy time for his vision to clear.
The frizzy-haired goon simply grunted and swung the two-by-four again. This time Simon was ready. Dodging to the side, he grabbed the two-by-four and gave it a yank, using the goon’s own momentum and pulling him off his feet.
Not letting any time waste, Simon pounced and wrestled the man for control of the two-by-four. Managing to get a firm grip on the board, Simon swung hard, giving his opponant a much deserved blow to the head and knocking him out cold.
He turned to the strange contraption just as the Maltese Reindeer emitted a brilliant flash and a strange, candy-cane striped portal of pulsating light opened next to the artifact. Simon was too late. He stood in stunned silence, a shiver creeping down his spine, as he watched the haunting figure of a demonic, deformed Santa Clause heave itself through the portal and into our dimension.
The Santa-thing grinned, revealing a mouth full of sharp, haphazardly pointed teeth. “Ho, ho, ho. Hello there, human. Have you been naughty or nice...?” - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - To Be Continued...
8 THE GRAVEYARD EXAMINER • DEC 20, 2011 - JAN 9, 2012
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