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COMMUNITY VOICES Gore-loving mothers eclipsed by the ‘Princess Pull’


Disney is the multi-billion dollar conglomerate it is today. Her fervor for the festivities


The author’s fanciful daughter contemplates how to dress shrunken heads for a proper palace gala. (Courtesy Terese Farmen)


I reveled in the eccentricity of the occasion. We have delighted in dressing the part of Zorro and Dracula, vampire minions, the Grim Reaper, mutilated vampire victims and even the occasional headhunter or super hero. Our zest has even taken us to Salem, Mass. where we spent one October 31 walking with self-proclaimed witches on a twilight stroll—our Frankenstein flashlights in tow as we avoided the crazy, drunk frat boys who thought they were as cool as us. While our Hallows Eve joy


H


alloween happens to be our favorite holiday of the season. Even before hav- ing a kid, my partner and


has only been enhanced by the presence of our little munchkin, its gender-bend- ing goriness has somewhat waned. It is also at this time that


parallels our own and we are proud to see that she (like us) begins planning her costume as early as June and becomes pretty serious about props and acces- sories during Comic-Con season in July. We try to be good gender- bending sisters and steer her in the direction of more masculine or even gory options on the scare spectrum. Yet, alas, she does not relent. For this brilliant first-grad- er, even Hermione Granger is not girl enough. Her wardrobe choices over the years have included the


to decide on a casual blue dress with book and basket or yellow ball gown with pink rose lapel. Admittedly, this princess fervor began at the age of two. It may have been my fault for trying to get her to dig the tomboys. It was that Halloween, four years ago, that nearly brought her to tears. She could not fathom that I had the audacity to dress her as Annie Oakley in overalls and pigtails when, god forbid, other 2-year-old girls were dressed in white dresses with ha- los or purple fedoras and feather boa shoes! Since that “mistake”, we’ve


“We’ve attempted to try on monster masks and werewolf gloves. Even vampire fangs barely get a giggle.”


we despair ever so slightly about the overpowering prevalence of the gender dichotomy in our world. It is during this com- mercial frenzy of Capitalism as represented in Targets across the nation that we are reminded that our daughter is completely, irrevocably a pink princess. She, like many other 6-year-old girls who worship Selena Gomez and Hannah Montana, are the reason


entire Disney princess spectrum and Dorothy from “The Wizard of Oz.” Dorothy only made the bill because of the silver sparkle slip- pers one of her Aunties bought for her birthday and the adorable blue and white gingham dress with built in sparkles she discov- ered at the costume shop. Our daughter is obsessed


with the notion that she will be Belle this year and is still trying


tried everything to get to get her to explore her drag king or even butch side. We’ve discussed the virtue of Transformer Alien Robots and the versatility of Spiderman’s web


fingers. We’ve discussed how cool the sleek Batmobile is or how cute the hair is on the toes of the Hobbit. We’ve attempted to try on monster masks and were- wolf gloves. Even vampire fangs barely get a giggle. It is with some sadness I admit that the Princess Pull decides her theme each year. Just like nobody could get me to wear a dress without skinned


October 8-October 21, 2010 GAY SAN DIEGO


9


PARENTHQOD TERESE FARMEN


up knees and Incredible Hulk Underoos showing through when I was 6, these lesbian mamas cannot influence this Barbie to believe blood and gore is the next full length ball gown.


Who knew Halloween could be so scary?


—Terese Farmen lives with her mind-blowingly smart, spunky, sparkly six-year-old and her witty and wise life partner of many years. She also works as an IT project manager and is a Lindy Hop dancer on the side.


A hectic month for ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’


uniform. The former military members looked dignified and handsome.


On Sept. 13, I wondered if I


could get a military escort while shopping at Safeway. On Sept. 20, Lady Gaga


turned up in Portland, Maine, to speak at a rally aimed at pressur-


GENERALGAYETY LESLIE ROBINSON


ing ball. On Sept. 9, a federal judge


B


in California declared DADT unconstitutional. Federal Dis- trict Court Judge Virginia Phil- lips struck down the military’s ban on openly gay soldiers after the plaintiffs challenged the law under the First and Fifth amendments to the U.S. Constitution. It was the Log Cabin Republicans that brought the suit. On Sept. 10, every other gay


organization kicked itself for allowing the gay GOP’ers to get there first.


On Sept. 12, two gay and


two lesbian soldiers, all DADT victims, escorted Lady Gaga to the MTV Video Music Awards. The five people involved wore dress uniforms—for Lady Gaga, an Alexander McQueen ensemble including tall gold feathers on her head is a dress


oy, there’s been a lot of action around “don’t ask, don’t tell” (DADT) lately. Let’s all follow the bounc-


ABC News/Washington Post poll, more than 75 percent of Americans think gays should be allowed to serve openly in the military. Such approval feels weird, but I could force myself to get used to it.


Again, on Sept. 21, the LGBT site JoeMyGod.com reported on


“We can hope during a lame-duck session the senators will act more like owls and less like ostriches.”


ing the state’s two senators to vote for DADT repeal. She sug- gested a new policy for straight soldiers who are “uncomfortable” being around gay soldiers. She said, “Our new law is called ‘If you don’t like it, go home!’”


On Sept. 21, every American soldier in Afghanistan and Iraq claimed to be uncomfortable around gay soldiers and asked to go home.


Also on Sept. 21, political


D-Day arrived. The “D” wound up standing for “Doofuses.” In the Senate, each Republican and two Democrats voted against repeal- ing DADT. Everybody accused everybody else of playing politics, and everybody was right. This vote was a blow to the


gay solar plexus. But it’s possible the Senate might address the issue again after the elections. We can hope during a lame-duck session the senators will act more like owls and less like ostriches. Often in our struggles we’ve


had to count on politicians, judges and voters treating us fairly because it was the right thing to do. Now we actu- ally have public opinion on our side—according to a recent


the Senate vote, and someone left this comment: “All Faggots must die.” The message was traced to the office of Georgia Republican Sen. Saxby Chambliss. On Sept. 22, Chambliss’


office issued a statement say- ing that so far it was unknown which person there left the com- ment. Then I issued a statement saying apparently the senator hires staffers with the soul of a plum pit.


On Sept. 23, U.S. govern-


ment lawyers filed to stop Judge Phillips (see Sept. 9) from issuing an injunction that would imme- diately halt DADT. They argued she should confine any injunction to the 19,000 members of the Log Cabin Republicans. Now there’s a bizarre idea.


Only Republican gays can be soldiers. In further bizarreness, the White House tried to explain why government lawyers were defending a policy President Obama wants to eradicate. Press Secretary Robert Gibbs must go through Excedrin like candy. On Sept. 24, a federal judge in


Tacoma, Wash., ruled that Maj. Margaret Witt, a lesbian and dec- orated flight nurse booted from


the Air Force, should get her job back. U.S. District Judge Ronald Leighton, an active Republican, became emotional as he recalled some of Witt’s testimony. He decided her discharge


advanced no legitimate military interest, and in fact weakened her squadron. So an open lesbian is going back to the military.


Two weeks of a DADT


roller coaster. Forget cautiously optimistic—I’m nauseously optimistic.


—Leslie Robinson goes through candy like candy. E-mail her at lesarobinson@gmail.com and check out her blog at www.general- gayety.com.


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