PSHE
Let’s talk about sex
Hazel Davis
In parliament, Beverley Hughes, the former children’s The setting of formal guidelines is something She said: “I think we had
minister, said: “The leaflet strongly encourages parents that teacher Caron Blake welcomes. a business one or two seminars on it, with
looks at a new
to share their values with their children and that clearly studies teacher with no experience or interest in quite an embarrassed nurse.”
includes their views about what’s right and wrong. PSHE, ms Blake feels she was She also does not feel her
“However, the leaflet also draws on research thrown in at the deep end in-school preparation as a
initiative that is
summarised in The Nature of Adolescence (John by her secondary trainee was that good either.
Coleman and Leo Hendry, 1999), which shows that the school when she She continued: “I got
helping parents
most effective way of communicating with teenagers the distinct impression I
is to encourage discussion, rather than simply was teaching that module because
and teachers when it
telling them what to think. Teenagers my mentor didn’t want to. The school
whose parents have an authoritative had a scheme of work in place with
rather than authoritarian style are some learning objectives and loose
comes to sex education
less likely to be involved in lesson plans, but the resources were
risky behaviour.” outdated – worksheets that would
The content of the not have been out of place when I
HEY aRE two words which put dread pamphlet was informed was at school 10 years before.
T
in the hearts of all new teachers – sex by research into parents’ “It was a surprise to be landed
education. views and experiences of with such an important topic on
It is never easy, whether you are talking to their teenage teaching practice. In fairness, it was
a teacher, parent or pupil, but a new children. It mentions a partly to do with the structure of the
government initiative aims to put paid recent survey which found curriculum, but I think also partly to
to the traditional chimps’ tea-party that more than a quarter of do with the teacher being less keen on
nature of British sex education. teenagers feel confused, teaching it.”
a new pamphlet, Talking to your Teenager About worried and scared about ms Bennett feels more work needs to
Sex and Relationships, is available now from UK sex and relationships, and be done at home: “I think as schools we do
chemist shops. that most of them wish they have a major responsibility to ensure children
The pamphlet, which has been written in conjunction could talk to their parents are properly educated about sex, but I think that
with Parentline Plus (which provides round-the-clock, about it. this should be done in collaboration with parents.
free confidential help and advice), suggests – among The pamphlet also states that It is really important to start sex education a lot sooner
other things – that parents use the lives of celebrities as at least 86 per cent of parents than we do, obviously to let them know the facts, but
a way of introducing the subject. think there would be fewer teenage was asked to take some also to dispel some of the playground mythology.”
Jeremy Todd, Parentline Plus chief executive, says pregnancies if more parents talked to sex education lessons. She added: “as teachers we do have a responsibility,
that when it comes to teenagers and sex we “can’t bury their teenagers about sex and relationships. She explained: “I had no idea because although in an ideal world parents should be
our heads in the sand and hope that the fascination will It also suggests that parents should find out what to expect, not having children of doing the sex talk bit, it is inevitable that many parents
wear off”. what relationship and sex education is being my own, and I had no idea how will shirk this responsibility, and those children still
He continued: “Instead, parents and carers need and taught in school so they can discuss what clued up the kids already were. need to know.” SecEd
want to talk to their children and ensure they have all their children thought of the lessons. moreover, I was wary of saying
the facts and information to help keep them safe and Sex education was made a compulsory too much or assuming too much • Hazel Davis is a freelance education journalist.
to avoid risky situations, such as sexually-transmitted part of the national curriculum in primary knowledge.”
illnesses or unplanned pregnancies. many parents need and secondary schools in October 2008. By mary Bennett teaches
Further information
the support to do this. 2010, a new PSHE curriculum will be in place, English in a Catholic secondary more guidance on sex education is available on
“One parent told us, ‘talk to your children about sex including compulsory sex and relationships advice. school, and recalls that her preparation www.teachernet.gov.uk (search for sex and relationships
– and everything else! It’s better that they learn about it Children will learn about puberty and intercourse from at college about teaching sex was “not education) and for more on Parentline Plus, visit
from you than in the playground at school’.” the age of seven and abortion from the age of 11. great”. www.parentlineplus.org.uk
Notes and jottings Independent thinking
What does obnubilate mean? A tale of three sisters
I am, at last, at alleyn’s School, the mixed meanwhile, simply ridiculed the absurdity of the aT THIS time of year, much focus is inevitably on then my teachers persuaded my parents to let me stay
independent school in south London, having impenetrable jargon which dominates education and tests and examinations. There has also been renewed in the 6th form and take a levels. However, I did
been confounded at the first two attempts. a prior hinders learning – the so-called “edu-babble”. debate in the media about “nature” versus “nurture”, have two jobs all the way through 6th form, working
engagement kept me, reluctantly, from attending the You had to read these three articles quite carefully and the fact that those from middle class homes and evenings, Saturdays and holidays to earn my keep. I
Gala night in march when Trevor Nunn opened the to be sure that the journalists concerned were all those from independent schools (not necessarily an left home after a levels, with no forwarding address,
splendid, glassy-foyered Edward alleyn Building covering the same story. anyone seeing only one of identical group at all) do better in life, dominate the but came back and went to university and achieved a
and the professional standard michael Croft Theatre. them would have emerged with a strange view of professions, and earn more pay. First. (I’ll draw a veil over the rest!)
The second attempt was foiled when the school what is really in the Nuffield Review. moral? Be a many, many years ago, when I trained as a Same parents, same home, same primary school
was closed by swine flu. But here I am now and promiscuous newspaper reader and encourage pupils teacher, we were taught that expectations had a – but somehow we all turned out different.
it was worth the wait. Deputy head, anthony to be so too. Teachers, of all people, cannot huge impact on pupil performance – perhaps I was lucky, my teachers encouraged
Faccinello, shows me round and it doesn’t afford to slip into the brainwashed belief today a reference to “pupils’ self-esteem” me. They lent me books, took me
take long to establish a rapport because that there is only one way of looking at would also feature. on theatre trips and encouraged me
we’re both English specialists. things. and anyway, in this case, we Twin studies are often quoted as to aim high. They had a powerful
So we linger in the airy, well should all read the Nuffield Review evidence, but all of us must have taught effect on me. Was I more
stocked library chatting to ms itself so that we can make up our siblings during our careers who had impressionable, more willing to
O’Donnell, the librarian, about own minds. very different talents and aptitudes from speak up and to break the mould?
this week’s hotly debated (among one another and who achieved in very Did I have to fight hard as I
alleyn’s pupils) CILIP Carnegie Where do you stand on the make- different ways. But surely they have was the youngest? I have no idea.
medal announcement. Then there’s up-in-school issue? In general it is shared both nature and nurture? Could Certainly some scientific studies
the fabulous pupil artwork and that probably a battle lost – even if you there be a “school effect” at work? But have shown elder siblings as being
new, 300-plus seat theatre with its think it’s one worth fighting. I well often siblings attend the same schools. most likely to succeed.
warm acoustics and perfect sight lines. remember the days when I kept eye my own case may provide an interesting What I do know is that endless
Quite a school – and very different make-up pads in my desk drawer and example. I am the youngest of three sisters, all discussions in the media about how we
from my dimly recalled local school girl would stand over a girl until she had very close in age. my eldest sister started her need to compensate pupils for their less
observations of it. as always I pick up (at removed the eye shadow and suchlike, secondary school career at one of the first privileged backgrounds, their particular
least) one good, simple and replicable which was not allowed in school. state comprehensives in a top stream, but schools and such like, fail entirely
idea while I’m there. Do you know But perhaps that was daft and, then our family moved to an area which to address the question of why our
what “obnubilate” means? No, neither anyway, it’s different now. Peter had grammar and secondary modern society, schools and teachers are not
did I. It means to cloud or obscure and Reed, head of Deyes High School in schools. She went to grammar school, inspiring pupils to want to learn and to
it was “word of the day” displayed on maghull near Liverpool, may be trying did not perform well and was moved out develop a passion for a particular area
the large internal electronic screen in the to stop a tidal wave in telling parents to the secondary modern at age 14, began or subject.
dining room for pupils and staff. What recently that make-up, if any, should O level and CSE courses, but left at age In most parts of the world, education
an upbeat, imaginative way of extending be “applied in moderation” and that he 15 before taking any examinations. is seen as the way out of poverty and
vocabulary without being heavy about it. will send home “persistent offenders” who my second sister found school very repression. In our country, the value of
use “excessive amounts of foundations and tough and her literacy skills (as we would education seems to have diminished. media
I have long argued that people who read only tanning creams” in order to “correct their now call them) were not strong. However, commentators too readily assume that whole
one newspaper develop a dangerously narrow, appearance”. But advertisers, the media and like the rest of us she was in a class of 45 groups of the population cannot or will not achieve.
distorted view of the world – which is why I have many parents and teachers will ridicule this. pupils in primary school and we all moved desks Expectations of today’s pupils are high in some
two, and on some weekdays, three delivered daily. The trouble is that society cannot make up its mind each week dependent on our test results, and the lower ways – 50 per cent to go to university (six per cent
Take for example the recent publicity given to about what children are. On the one hand we wrap your mark the further away from the teacher and the in my day) – but in other ways they remain low.
the Nuffield Review, maybe the most far-reaching them in cotton wool, and turn “protection” into an blackboard you sat – a very perverse system! She Social mobility is decreasing not increasing. Have we
assessment of 14 to 19 education in half a century. industry. On the other, we encourage them to sexualise went to a secondary modern school and left at age 15 devoted too much time to school structures, regulatory
The Daily Mail declared – loudly – in its headline that themselves (and make no mistake – that’s what it is) without any suggestion of any public examinations. requirements, standardising the curriculum, target-
pupils “would be better off learning woodwork than with “come-on” face paint and clothes almost from I was a rebel. I went to grammar school, wearing setting and testing, and lost sight of the pupils and
pursuing academic subjects”. The Daily Telegraph infancy. Is it any wonder our teenagers are confused? a label as sister of a failure. Fortunately, we moved their real needs?
took the class-ist line and quoted in its headline again and my new school knew nothing of my sister. I
the review’s conclusion that the present education • Susan Elkin is a freelance education journalist and decided to stay on and take O levels – the first person • Marion Gibbs is headmistress of the independent
system is “tailored to richer pupils”. The Times, former teacher. in my family ever to reach such dizzy heights – and James Allen’s Girls’ School in London.
SecEd • June 25 2009 
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