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MARKET TRADER, DECEMBER 21, 2018 - JANUARY 3, 2019


served with chips from the chippy and lashings of gravy. (The phrase is also cockney rhyming slang for ‘eyes’). Noel: Noel Edmunds is


a presenter with a dyed beard, who used to host a show where people opened and closed boxes and Mr Edmunds pretended to talk to someone on an old fashioned telephone. Ornaments: Ornaments


are decorative items made of wood, pottery and other breakable materials, which people buy for their cats. Unfortunately the owners are not aware that they are buying these products for their cats; only the cats know this, which


is why they display no guilt whatsoever when they knock them off and smash them. Presents: There are several


potential presents and any number of different pasts, but only Dr Who (and one or two string theory scientists) really understand what that means. Queens speech: Melesha


Katrina O’Garro, known professionally as Lady Leshurr, is an English grime and hip hop rapper, singer, and producer from Kingshurst in Solihull. She is best known for her Queen’s Speech series of freestyle raps. Rudolph: Rudolph is a


male first name, and less commonly, a surname. It’s


a Germanic name deriving from two stems: Hruod, meaning ‘fame’ or ‘glory’, and olf meaning ‘wolf’. It is a common name in many germanic-language speaking countries in Europe, but rarer in North-American countries. Santa: Santa Barbara is a


city on the central California coast, with the Santa Ynez Mountains as dramatic back- drop. Mediterranean-style white stucco buildings with red-tile roofs reflect the city’s Spanish colonial heritage. Turkey: In show business


terms, a ‘turkey’ is a failure or a flop, such as a film that cost millions to make but bombs at the box office, or a theatrical


production that gets slated by the critics and avoided by audiences.


Underwear: The Association of Pointless Awards Society has voted Christmas-themed boxer shorts to be the most pointless item of clothing in the entire history of apparel. Vixen: Vixen is the name


given to a female fox, but is also used to describe a spirited or quarrelsome woman. It’s also the name of an 80s all girl rock band, as well as an animated American web series based on a DC Comics character. White Christmas: The definition that the Met Office uses for a white Christmas is for one snowflake to be observed falling in the 24 hours of December 25. Traditionally this was within the area of the Met Office building in London, but with the increase in betting on where a white Christmas might occur, the number of locations has increased and can now include sites such as Buckingham Palace, Belfast (Aldergrove Airport), Aberdeen (Pittodrie - Aberdeen FC), Edinburgh (Castle), Coronation Street in Manchester and the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff. X Factor: Simon Cowell


These ‘lights’ in the sky are actually electrically charged particles from the sun) (Photo: Diana Robinson)


likes to release the Winner’s Song in good time for the festive season in the hope that he can get another


FEATURE 19


Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, the type of book one might give a ‘yule’ as a Christmas gift


Christmas number one. Yule: According the


Urban Dictionary, a yule is an awkward, nerdy but attractive guy. Stereotypically geeky, he usually has terrible hair, but is super genuine


and often has a great smile. Zen and the Art of


Motorcycle Maintenance: Written by Robert M Pirsig and first published in 1974, this is the type of book one might give a yule as a Christmas gift.


Looking for a new market?


Gosport Market is a long established south coast market held twice a week; on Tuesdays and Saturdays. This busy market is located in a prime spot on Gosport’s main High Street and close to the pedestrian Ferry that links Gosport with Portsmouth - so there are plenty of passing shoppers.


With pitches competitively priced, 2019 is a great time to take a pitch at Gosport Market and we’d love to hear from you.


To book a regular or casual market pitch please see below:


If you require an application form, please email: markets@gosport.gov.uk or you can download from the Gosport Council Website.


MYB3148


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