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ALL THE LATEST NEWS, VIEWS AND STORIES FROM AROUND YOUR LOCAL AREA:SEPTEMBER/OCTOBER WORLD OF DIGITAL


THE WONDERFUL AND COMPUTERS


David... and the wrong pants!


Fifty-two years on the planet and I have succumbed! It is a sad day, but I appear to have run out of options. I am wearing somebody else's underpants! According to the waistband they appear to belong to a chap called Calvin Klein and frankly I'd rather he had them back. I'm deeply troubled to be in his pants, so let me tell you why:


I've been involved in Brand and Marketing all my working life. I've also been buying my own underwear since the age of seventeen. Now I have never been a man for ‘designer’ labels. I like quality, be it cars, sausages or underpants. I don’t like labels and I don’t like advertising other people’s Brands on my clothing.


I have always been a Marks and Spencer underpants man. M&S black fitted trunks with a COTTON waistband. NOT, it is important to note, an elastic waistband, AND furthermore a PLAIN waistband. However, recently they stopped selling my favoured style of underwear and started selling their underpants with elastic tops printed with the word Autograph. That’s not even someone’s name?


No problem, I thought, I will just have to buy my underwear elsewhere. I have searched online and even been shopping but I can’t find ANY unbranded ‘Quality Trunks’.


Having worn out my trusty plain trunks, I had to give in and was dragged out to buy new ones. I was presented with an array of underwear, including Y-fronts but EVERY ITEM WAS BRANDED WITH A NAME OR A WORD!


Why am I so offended? Well, why on earth do you want to wander round advertising someone else’s brand on your underwear? It makes absolutely no sense, you don’t see the same thing on women’s pants, so why as a bloke, is it considered acceptable and the norm that I would want to wear underwear bearing someone else’s name? It is a marketeer’s dream but to me it is just annoying. I bought and paid for my trunks, they are David’s not Calvin’s!


What on earth has this rant got it do with digital? Well dear reader, I need your help! I have not found anywhere online where I can buy quality unbranded underwear. If I must buy branded, then surely somewhere can do them with my Brand on them? I want rid of Calvin, I don’t want him in my underwear drawer or about my person, so if you have a link to bespoke undies dot com, or personalise my pants dot co dot uk, then let me have it because at 52, I'll be damned if I'm wearing someone else's pants!


If you have questions do yell.


David Jeffries 016973 61066 • dj@ministryofdoing.co.uk Solving People’s Digital Problems


MORTGAGE SERVICES LTD Independent Mortgage Advice


Office: 01900 821 713 Mobile: 07713 711 218


Brian Sloan


brian@cumbriamortgages.co.uk www.cumbriamortgages.co.uk


WWW.THECOCKERMOUTHPOST.CO.UK


I will get you a ‘Made to Measure Mortgage’ CUMBRIA INDEPENDENT


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