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FAMILY FUN


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May 2012 1


Sideline screaming: how some parents cause kids to quit sports


by Alison Stanton Anyone who has ever attended a chil-


dren’s sports game has probably seen one in action: A mouthy and rude parent who is yelling at the kids, the coaches and probably a few of the spectators, too. Unfortunately, these overzealous parents


can be more than just nuisances for everyone who is trying to play, referee or watch the game. According to a recent study released by i9 Sports in Chandler, their misplaced pas- sions can also cause their children to quit playing sports all together. In the national survey of 300 kids ages


8 to 14 who play team sports, i9 Sports reports that 31% of them wish that adults were not watching their games, mostly because the grownups “yell too much, are too distracting, make players nervous and put pressure on


them to play better.” Of the respondents who say they have


been called a “not so nice” name while playing sports, 12% report that it was some- one else’s parent who made the remark. Grant Gunkel and Steve Goodell are both


program directors with i9 Sports, a franchise of youth sports leagues, camps and programs that offers team sports for boys and girls ages 3 to 14. They have both witnessed their share of parents who overdo it on the sidelines. “We do feel like parents


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can play a huge role in both encouraging and discour- aging their kids who play team sports. Some of them can cause a lot of stress by having unreasonable expec- tations about their kids,” Gunkel says, adding that this is one of the biggest mistakes parents can make. “All parents want


their kids to be success- ful, but sometimes they put undue pressure on them and want them to do something that their child might not even be wired to do,” Goodell adds.


GOOD SPORTSMANSHIP: Ayden Zinn, 6, has a firm grip on the ball as he runs to make a touch- down during a play in a PeeWee Division football game offered through i9 Sports in Chandler. Submitted photo


aspect; many are not ready to get into the winning and losing angle of it,” she explains. “Parents should encourage a variety of sports, figure out what their kids are inter- ested in and what they enjoy and give them a variety of experiences.” Moms or dads who tend to get too


hot under the collar during games should do their best to just let the kids play and


not feel like they have to always say some- thing to their kids during the game, Gunkel says. “Parents need to learn to wait an hour after the game to speak up,


especially if it is something negative.” What has also helped keep parents calmer, Goodell says, is to have policies in place that ensure everyone will play dur-


ing every game. “This really helps to take the pressure off


BAD SPORTSMAN- SHIP: Rude parents who yell at their children and their teammates can cause kids to want to give up playing team sports for good. iStockphoto.com


Widen the field Leslie Hicks, a physical education teacher


at Tarwater and Knox elementary schools in Chandler, says she has noticed that some parents tend to be very supportive of compe- tition, and want to enroll their kids into just one sport. “They will get their kids into a recre-


ational league and then maybe also a travel- ing league for just one type of sport, which can lead to the kids suffering from issues per- taining to overuse of parts of their bodies, as well as mental and physical burnout,” says Hicks, who is also president of Arizona Association for Health, Physical Education, Recreation and Dance. Instead of pushing their children to


focus on just one sport and be as com- petitive as possible, parents need to make it a point to understand what the devel- opmentally appropriate stages are for their kids, Hicks says. “The younger kids who play team sports, they do it for enjoyment and the social


of everyone. The kids know they will be playing no matter what, and it also lets the parents relax and not have to worry if their child will get in the game.”


Lead by example Coaches also need to make it a point to


teach good sportsmanship to the children, Goodell says. “One of the things that is great about


this league is every week we have a sports- manship medal that we give out that


reflects a character trait or value we have been talking about that week. It might be for being a team player, or showing courtesy or respect.” Gunkel says the program directors at


i9 Sports also spend time with the coaches to ensure they are upbeat and positive with the kids on their teams, even when they are losing a game. “We harp on the importance


of them being role models to the kids and to the other coaches who are there,” he says. What parents need to keep


in mind above everything else, Gunkel says, is to just let their kids be kids and enjoy them- selves. “The kids are playing to have


a good time, get some exercise and learn the game. Parents need to let their kids play with their buddies. We don’t want to discourage them because then they might never want to play


sports again.” That would be a shame, Hicks says,


because of the many benefits of team sports. “They range from basic skill development


to health benefits and social benefits, when they learn to work out problems in a socially appropriate way,” she says. “They are also a great avenue for devel-


oping confidence in kids both at school and at home.” i9 Sports is at 3165 S. Alma School Rd.,


Suite 29 in Chandler. For more information, call 480-664-4039 or visit www.i9sports.com.


Alison Stanton is a freelance writer who


lives in the East Valley. She can be reached at Alison@SanTanSun.com.


Resources Books: “The Kids' (and parents', too!) Book of Good Sportsmanship: An easy-to-read guide for families,” by Leslie A. Susskin “Encyclopedia of Sports Parenting: Everything You Need to Guide Your Young Athlete,” by Dan Doyle “101 Ways to Be a Terrific Sports Parent: Making Athletics a Positive Experience for Your Child,” by Joel Fish and Susan Magee “Just Let The Kids Play: How to Stop Other Adults from Ruining Your Child's Fun and Success in Youth Sports,” by Bob Bigelow, Tom Moroney and Linda Hall


Website: www.life.familyeducation.com/sports- parents/behavior/36401.html www.voices.yahoo.com/bad-sports-parents-ruin- everyone-369141.html www.education.com/reference/article/Ref_Targeting


GOOD SPORTSMANSHIP: A dad talks quietly with his son during recent soccer tryouts. STSN photo


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