Simply…. Empowered! By Crystal Andrus
The Really Real
“Why,” You may ask yourself, “Do things seem to mess up every time they’re going great? Is it me? Am I sabotaging?”
We may blame a slew of reasons— even justifiable ones—when things mess up and yet ultimately, very few of them ever help us change our pat- terns. They simply keep us stuck.
So, let’s be really open . . . really honest . . .
and really courageous. Let’s look at ourselves!
Think back to a time in your life when things were going really well—whether you’d just landed your dream job or your dream mate. Finally feeling like life was falling into place, you were ready and willing to let go of the past and create a fantastic future. And then it happened . . . again.
That voice inside your head begins taunting you: (By the way, this entire rant could be about “him” or “her” instead of “them.”)
“Who do you think you are? Pathetic. You don’t belong here. Trying to fit
26 Reason You Sabotage!
in somewhere you don’t. Don’t you know ‘these people’ are special and important? You aren’t. Thinking you deserve this life. You’re not special. This is exhausting trying to fit in. God, look at you anyway. You’re fat. Your clothes are awful. You’re just down- right pathetic trying to make yourself look good and sound so important. You can’t fool these people. They don’t want you anyway. Don’t you get it? Who do you think you are? When are you going to learn? Go home. Leave. And you might as well get some McDonald’s on the way!”
You climb into your car. Can’t race away fast enough. Your energy has dropped. You’re exhausted. Totally disempowered.
And yet, just hours ago you were feeling on top of the world . . .
The further you get from “them” (the office, his apartment, whatever “good thing” it might be), the easier it is to breathe. Relief. Maybe you will stop for that ham- burger and fries.
“See, it’s true,” Your brain begins ra- tionalizing with you. “Look how much better you feel now that you’ve got- ten out of there—away from them?”
Aug/Sept 2011
Wow. You do feel better. You do feel relief. You do feel less pressure. Even liberated. Free. Maybe that voice in your head is your friend, after all. Maybe it really was just looking out for you.
Before you know it, you hear it speaking to you again. This time with much more gentleness:
“They’re actually the pathetic ones. They’re the ones who are lost and confused; desperate to be ‘big shots’. You don’t need to be in their fake, shallow world. You don’t need them, thinking they’re so much better than you. Humph! Move on. Forget about it.”
For a while you actually feel good about your decision to run away. You’re happy you trusted your “instincts.”
Besides, so many of today’s self-help gurus teach us that finding relief is the best way to bring yourself closer to your true authentic self.
Well, phew. You’ve definitely found relief. Yep. A little shopping, a glass of wine (or three), chatting with strangers on Facebook, a nice bag of potato chips, watch some TV. All good stress-relievers. For sure.
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