Quantum
HEALTH
Issue 9 February 2011
‘Me, now that I’m rid of her! he replied.’
This joke is at least 1600 years old. It was discovered with some ancient Greek writings. Nothing changes!
Perfect love To return to Plato – how many loves do you know that meet his criteria for perfect love? If you are in a one-to-one relationship, ask yourself: Is our love fearless? Unchanging? Non-discriminatory? Unconditional? Completely unselfish? Endlessly forgiving
I would argue that romantic love by its very nature cannot meet these criteria. All too often it is needs-based, short-lived, highly conditional (‘I’ll only love you if you do all this for me’) and unforgiving. It is also discriminatory – exclusive to one person.
But you may disagree.
Moreover, even the happiest long-term relationships are likely to have most, if not all, of these characteristics. After all, many long-term relationships work on the basis that ‘I’ll do just enough to stop you leaving, if you do just enough to make me stay.’
Again – you may disagree. Higher human love
There’s a third type of human love. It’s a love that goes beyond our families and friends and encompasses all of humankind, perhaps even the whole of creation. Again we must be careful. It’s easy to profess love for those caught in an earthquake or tsunami on the other side of the world, and ignore the illness and suffering right under our nose.
One of the great passages on love was written by Paul of Tarsus (and yes, this is one of the few passages attributed to him that he actually wrote). Professor Henry Drummond, a 19th Century scientist and theologian, was so impressed by this passage he wrote a book on it and urged his students to read this passage daily for three months. Many reported that it had transformed their lives.
24 Quantum Health
‘Love is patient and kind. It is never jealous. It does not boast, it is not proud; it is never rude or self-seeking; it is not easily angered, and keeps no record of wrongs. Love takes no pleasure in evil and delights in truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, to persevere.’ (1 Corinthians, 13, 4-7)
‘You will find as you look back upon your life,’ wrote Drummond, ‘that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.’
I challenge you: read these words daily. Then put them into practice. Keep a diary, and at the end of three months, look back on your experiences and reflect on your progress. It will be profound.
But there’s an even greater form of love: Universal Love
Human love is a pale shadow of the love expressed by the creative intelligence that sustains us, whether you see this in theological terms or as the information fields that quantum physicists tell us underpin the physical universe.
Chemically-driven, delusional romantic love, and needs-based, co-dependent love exist only within the confines of our own skin, shaped by human instincts and emotions; but universal love is not an emotion, lays down no conditions, and it does not discriminate.
We are charged with spiritual energy (however you describe it), and that energy is love. It is the very Life-Force within us. And it meets all of Plato’s criteria – it is fearless, constant, non-discriminatory, unconditional, completely unselfish and endlessly forgiving.
Anthony de Mello wrote: ‘Is it possible for the rose to say, ‘I will give my fragrance to the good people who smell me, but I will withhold it from the bad? Or is it possible for a lamp to say, ‘I will give my light to the good people in this room, but I will withhold it from the evil people?’ These are images of what love is about. It is around you like the air you breathe and in every atom of your body.’
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