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The best things in life are free
What we Want for Xmas!

@ Ain’t Nothin’ But, 20 Kingly St, Tis the season of giving! Aww- few things that we’ve had our eye a little more risky. Neon bikini tops in another country who really needs
Soho, W1B 5PZ www… But that means it’s also the on for a while and I bet you have to. and uv reactive fluffy boots. It’s just it. A few years ago I received a toilet
Monday–Wednesday 6pm–1am
Free Karaoke
season of getting and here at The a little bit more exciting then that from my nan and got my little sister
Live Blues music in a friendly,
@ The Birdcage
Guestlist Network there’s been a Christmas is when the weird and scarf you saw, although probably some chickens. Perfect presents
international and intimate atmo- wonderful gift ideas come out of not as warm. for that special someone who
80 Columbia Road
the woodwork, all you have to do wants to give a special something
Esther King
@ Notting Hill Arts Club, 21 Not-
Bethnal Green/Old Street
is spend 5 minutes surfing the web But if like most you prefer the under- back.
ting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ
(loo’s and chickens)
E2 7QB
and your bound to find something wear to remain UNDERwear then
Saturdays 4-8pm
Fridays & Saturdays
for everyone. But even if you’re too spice things up with sexy lingerie.
Rough Trade’s free showcase
lazy to do that we’ve done it for you! I know I know…People always rec- (equalizer tee)
with plenty of live bands. (See end for cool sites). ommend this, but seriously guys it’s
a win win situation: thoughtful and
Entranced by the X-factor
FreeCOMEDY The bigger the provocative, isn’t this the sort of
(furry bacteria)
frenzy that’s sweeping the
@ Theatre Royal Bar,
nation? Get your song on
web grows Christmas we all want? And
Gerry Raffles Square,
at this quintessential Eng-
the more better yet, you can now
(slipper socks)
Stratford East, E15 1BN
lish pub with a reputation
crazy things even get fair trade
Mondays 8pm there are to panties. Make sure
that precedes it. With a
Weekly line-up of dynamic come- buy on it. From to wash on the
great crowd that mixes lo-
dians to tickle your funny bones...
cal east-enders with trendy
shares in Football ‘I care’ cycle.
@ Camden Head, 2 Camden
FreeCLUBBING thems ‘from AC/DC to MGMT Shoreditch cats, expect to ATG &
Clubs and plush luxury blackjack BodumTshh.
(raving threads for chicks)
Walk, Camden, N1 8DY
@ Amersham Arms, 388 New and from Missy to Kissy’ along- listen (and sing along) to a
tables, to the weird cuddly toys
‘Every Other Monday’ is a new
Cross Rd, SE14 6TY side cutting-edge beats with massive range of music - Urban Nerds
made to look like microorganisms. Well if you know
fortnightly gig showcasing best
Fridays their mega sound system and everything from ‘70s pop
Urban Nerds and ATG Do
I’m thinking a Brain Cell for lil sis someone with
(for the stoner)
new comedians & established
10pm – 3am late-license. songs to new popular indie
One NYE - Thursday 31st
and Ear Ache for mumzy. jokes as good
acts in one of Camden’s oldest
‘Whip It’ has super resident DJs @ The London Fields, 137 Mare
9pm-5.30am, Secret Location, £20
as that then The
(gadgets and gizmos)
who you can count on bringing St, London, E8 3RH
Urban Nerds join forces with ATG’s Do-One to throw the ultimate
I know you guys all Comedy School will
you lashings of cool party an- Sundays
If it’s a general genre-mix of mu- New Year’s mash-up featuring all the Urban Nerds, ATG and Do-
like a good rave help train the joker of your
8pm – 2am
sic you’re looking to bop to, you’ll One resident DJs and some super special guests! As well as that
but if you’ve got group become a comedian. Then
(for rising talent)
Disco Bloodbath’s Damon Mar-
find hip hop, DnB, R&B, funk and they’ve got mind blowing art installations and apparently some
a hardcore mate you say you’re their agent nab your-
tin, Daniel Shepherd and weekly
reggae tones in this Shoreditch surprises lined up to bring in the New Year! I love a good surprise
who can’t get self 40% and you’ve got a sweet little
guests take this gastropub to
establishment. me. All of this is backed up with the clubbers favourite dance
enough of it there’s business.
new levels with disco, techno,
@ Cargo, 83 Rivington St, partner: Funktion 1. Can’t wait!!!
plenty of gear out On a more serious note, here at
electro-pop, new wave and indie
Shoreditch EC2A 3AY
there to suit them. the Guestlist Network we’re not all
Fridays 7pm – 3am
For the gentlemen about gambling, raves and sex!!!
@ The Redchurch, 107 Red-
‘Eat Your Own Ears’ = popular
why not invest in a T- Oh god no, we have substance.
church St, London, E2 7DL
weekly freebie with continuous
Equaliser. You know So, if like us you
Wednesdays 8pm – 1.30am
genre-hopping line-ups
Chew the Fat! it’s one of those funky know some-
Friday 11th 10pm-5pm, Cable club, £13
t-shirt that have a light one (or you
The one and only Fake Blood makes his debut appearance at
box that moves to yourself)
Chew The Fat! as he celebrates the release of his Mix CD, the
the music, so who likes
first in the Wax:On Compilation Series. Joining him in the main
even if your to keep
Welcome to the microbial ball!
that friends will thank
room will be Evil Nine. After their impressive back-to-back set at
friend has a balance
you for it as these
Matter, Fat! residents Foamo & A1 Bassline return for a second
no rhythm at to there he-
We all dance around the possibil- nified a million times actual hilarious gift to give someone
GIANTmicrobes are so
helping. Scotland’s finest Hostage brings his unique brand of
least there donistic soul
ity of catching diseases and virus- size! Originally designed as this party season. With nearly
cute that everyone loves these fun
party bass whilst Wax:On bring Eskimo Twins to the floor.
c l o t h e s then we’re in
es everyday, but most of us were a taboo-breaking educa- 80 GIANTmicrobes in the
soft-toy characters even if you’d
do. Alter- the perfect
blissfully unaware of them person- tional toy (they come range; Kissing disease,
normally steer well away from the
n a t i v e l y era. A great
ally until GIANTmicrobes came with a fact card on Swine Flu, Herpes,
real McCoy!
for the lady Noughties phenomenomenom is
along - the latest quirky collect- the medical history Common Cold, Mad raver why not the ability to give a gift to some one
ible cuddly-toy craze from the US. of the condition and Cow, The Pox, Bird
Prices range from £6.95 to
Shiva NYE
try something whilst also giving a gift to someone
These 13cm to 18cm furry critters how to avoid it), they Flu, Ecoli, MRSA, or
£19.95 each, plus postage from
are what common microbes look are spreading virally even a Brain Cell - the or
These guys have shown us they
like under a microscope, only mag- in popularity as the latest list is endless! The crazy thing is
01548 831070
know how to have a good time and
throw one mega party. Shiva are now
set to give us their first ever New
Years Eve special. After the banging
Pacha party we know we’ll get a
good ear full of the best house from The Optimist
the residents and few new friendly
faces. If you want to have a good
night with some lovely people
here’s the place to be. Look out for

the panda! ;)
What a
great year!
Innovation NYE United As One
William Benn
Thursday 31st 8pm-12am. Fire, £37.50
This is what some of you might
Ok guys, It’s a BIG night and this place is gonna be live. Describ-
be about to say:
ing themselves as a ‘multi arena music festival’ Innovation has
“Sh*t, it’s winter again. It’s so
a bit more to offer then the average NYE rave. Loads of rooms,
cold and dark and depressing
loads of music (over 100 djs) and they’ve thrown in the kitchen
and cold and miserable and dark
sink too, well better then that really…A HOT TUB!!! DnB, Dub-
and cold. Boo hoo. I’m going to
step, Old Skool fans, enter the crazy circus of Innovation to ring
cry myself to sleep dreaming of
in the New Year. Oh and they’ll be serving breakfast between
Trinidad and Tobago.”
Well, before you get salty tear-
juice all over your Thomas the
Tank Engine pillowcase stop and
think for a second and when you
Muak & Egg NYE Masquerade Ball stop, think this and this alone:
Thursday 31st 9pm-11am, Egg, £25-£45
“How f*****g good was 2009?!”
A nice and sexy deep house night at Egg. Great music, great
The answer, my increasingly gor-
Yep... this guy had a great year.
people. It’s been an absolutely hectic year for these guys and I
geous and ever more self-confi-
find out about the top events of London. The world is your oyster
bet there going to celebrate it with an even more hectic party.
dent friend, is “very”.
the past year. And believe you (card). Now, head up, smile and
Get your glitziest glad rags and don those most glamorous masks
Why? Well if you really want to
me (them and us) this issue is be nice to people. Happiness
because Muak are hosting a Masquarade ball and that means
know you could take 10 minutes
packed with all of your favourite breads happiness. So if you want
there’s going to be glitter EVERYWHERE!!!
out of your gloriously fulfilling
memories. But if you’re looking to end a beautiful year on high
schedule to read through the
for a shorter list then how about note make someone else realise
pages of this paper, where you’ll
this: You are alive. You are in how beautiful it was too.
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