get relief. Not so for our beautiful counter faucet? That’s cool, cause as girls, we can
parts who have to run from crowded bar to just claim that we’re incompetent and make
crowded bar praying that the line isn’t fifteen a guy do it. Fixing things sucks. Why not
girls deep. Girls may be able to bat there outsource?
eyes and smile coyly and get what they
want from us guys but when it comes to the We don’t have weak spots. Gee, I’m sorry
women’s restroom no amount of sex appeal that you got kicked in the balls. I’ve heard
is going to get you to the front of THAT that that really hurts. Unfortunately, I can’t
line. What’s a girl to do but find a place to really commiserate because I don’t have a
squat. Guys usually have their pack of drunk particularly sensitive body part dangling
buddies laughing behind them as they water off of my person. No, breasts are not an
a bush. I have never seen a pack of ladies equivalent.
cheering on a girl who had the misfortune
of not finding a restroom and had to let We’ve got what you want. Guys will always
loose in public. Kind of a party killer if you end up falling all over themselves to keep us
ask me. I have also had the misfortune of happy, cause they’re lost without the poon.
walking into the men’s bathroom only to find When it comes down to it, your right hand
a lady sitting in a urinal before she’s about just doesn’t hold up in the face of a real-live
to burst. At that point, I thanked my lucky girl. God knows you guys try, though.
stars for my Johnson. Sitting in a urinal
looks VERY uncomfortable especially when We’re sexy, and sex sells. All we have to do
a perspective Johnson comes walking in. is show a little cleavage, stick our butts out,
and bat our eyes. Bingo! We move up to the
If all this weren’t enough to prove the front of the line, get bigger discounts, and
supremacy of the male persuasion. There get freebies. It might be manipulative and
is the matter of “entry” and “exit”. At no morally suspicious, but that hasn’t stopped
time do I feel the need to have anything us.
larger than my stream leave my body.
After witnessing child birth I am forever a We can cover up our imperfections. Thanks
advocate of the Johnson and if you ladies to makeup, hair dye, and all sorts of
were asked whilst in the act of birth, I cosmetic procedures, we can cover up the
believe, (after you ripped my head off for blemishes and the grey hair. I don’t care
asking a question and not providing a well if they make man makeup…that is never
timed ice chip for the lips) you would agree. acceptable. And Rogaine is just kind of sad.
We can exceed expectations. Every time
. . . . . . . . . .
a girl says something intelligent or witty,
people generally seem to be a lot more
surprised and appreciative of our opinions
Why Boobs Are Better
and knowledge. It can be a pain in the ass,
Written By Lisa Bornhorst
but I kind of enjoy being awesome and
getting way more credit than usual for it.
Unless I have to pee in the woods, I never
regret the day I was born a girl. These days,
being a female is pretty damn wonderful.
We can exploit our own stereotypes. Don’t
want to build that IKEA desk or fix the leaky
35
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