Views > copywriting
Selling a sale I
by Herschell Gordon Lewis Present a
valid claim of uniqueness or you’ll have all the impact of a wet noodle
f you’re old enough, you may remember when the word sale not only suggested discounts and specials not usually offered by a retailer or a catalogue, but proved the validity of the suggestion.
Those were ancient times. In today’s frenzied Facebook/Twitter/YouTube ambience, sale has become such a generic word it has all the impact of a wet noodle. I’m looking at a printed US catalogue on whose cover is ANNUAL SALE. Annual is in 36-point type and sale is 120-point type. Just below, reversed in a circle, is “Shop our ONLINE SALE!” And below that, in a reverse circle of a different colour, is “This is your only invitation to shop now! [name of company].com sale.” Confusion! Inside are offers, all of which are headed by Save and a percent. The current darling, a QR code block, is there too. A chunk of type yells, “HURRY, supplies are limited! Save up to 75% online-only sale!” Now, wait a minute. If it’s online
only, what is a Cami Dress doing there, originally $64, now $39.99, complete with SKU code for immediate ordering—from this printed catalogue? And here’s a Toning Ball Workout Kit, reduced from $29.98 to $23.99. And a Rush Ottoman, a Wakeup Clock, a bunch of sweaters, jewellery, belts, blah-blah-blah—in the printed catalogue. None of these saves the customer 75
percent, but the “up to” is something of a cover. Hold that thought for a moment. If you agree that “up to” is something of a cover, please also agree that the two words are “something of a cover” and not “a cover.” Here’s a UK online catalogue. The entire splash page of the menswear section:
NOW 60% OFF CLEARANCE SALE MENSWEAR
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Uh-oh, what’s this? Vertically at left edge: “Now up to.” I, as a typical customer, am looking for specifics. An online catalogue without specifics parallels a Rolls-Royce without wheels. Any appreciation is swamped by frustration. Click! I’m off to more fertile (read: more specifics-friendly) websites.
Direct Commerce Catalogue e-business
www.catalog-biz.com Second, if the printed catalogue is
intended to be a driver to the web, let it drive. Half the job of yelling is to grab attention. How about the other half—telling the target-individual why you’re yelling and what the benefit is.
As we numb our prospects—and worse,
our multibuyers—with boiler-plate use of the word sale, let’s remember a nastier word lurking out there in Marketland: competition. Nothing in this catalogue glorifies any offer- uniqueness. For that matter, nothing in this catalogue even suggests offer-uniqueness. As a final kick: whether you mail one catalogue a year, a dozen catalogues, or you no longer mail catalogues at all because you’re online only, each catalogue in any medium has to present a valid claim of uniqueness. What is the incentive? Why should anyone pay attention now? And what can you do to prevent a deadly “Here’s another one” reaction whose poison can infect your next attempt to sell something? I’ll tell you the answer to all those questions. It’s a positive, aggressive, and salesworthy answer to the question we should ask ourselves about any and every business proposition: “If I were the recipient of this offer instead of the sender, would it spur me to respond?” Easy, huh?
Herschell Gordon Lewis is president of Lewis Enterprises. He writes copy for and consults with direct response and catalogue companies worldwide.
Two questions on the table Two questions about this catalogue, and for others who use the word sale as a generic: First, if a vendor’s printed catalogue and online catalogue are in competition with each other, copy can’t be a throwaway. If ever, in our sacred universe, the professional laying on of hands has been called for, now is the prime time. Yelling “ONLINE SALE” and then loading the printed catalogue with specials generates confusion. Even a primitive line or two, such as “We couldn’t wait to show you these, and they’re just a few of what you’ll see online,” would have added a touch of verisimilitude.
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