Dad intended to walk them both down the aisle, so it broke my heart knowing that would never happen. Initially, Dad just said, “What will be, will be,” but then he had a couple of bad days. He kept saying he couldn’t understand why this was happening to him as he’d been a good husband to my mum Doreen, who died in 2001, plus a good dad to me and my brother John, 48. I was lost for answers, but eventually he picked himself up. The hospital put us in touch with Marie Curie and a nurse came to stay with him every evening from 10pm until 8am, so Dad didn’t struggle or panic if he woke up in the night and needed pain relief or help getting to the toilet. He could have a good sleep – and so could I. It was my 50th
birthday in December that year and Dad
was determined to be there to celebrate with me and also to spend one last family Christmas together. By the time Christmas came around, he was too weak
to come to my house, so we took the food and presents round to him. I planned to stay with him every night between Christmas Eve and Boxing Day because I didn’t think the Marie Curie nurses would be working. By then
I’d become sick myself with worry, so I knew sleeping on his sofa wouldn’t do me any good, but I couldn’t bear to leave him all alone when he was so poorly. To my amazement, the nurses assured me that they’d be doing their visits as normal throughout the Christmas and New Year period. I was so relieved, and it meant we could really enjoy that precious last Christmas together, knowing we could get the rest we needed to stay strong. The stress and worry you go through when someone
you love is dying is huge, so without the nurses’ support I wouldn’t have coped. Thanks to them, Christmas Day was wonderful, and although Dad was weak, he seemed happy and made us all laugh. We kept it as normal as possible and I’ll treasure that day forever. Dad went into a hospice on 6 January 2010 and passed
away within ten minutes of getting there. Although we knew it was coming, it was still a shock because it came so quickly at the end. Two years on, we still miss him a lot but we can take comfort knowing he got his wish to spend one last Christmas with us all. And that was made all the more possible thanks to the Marie Curie nurses.
On the web
For up-to-date news on how Candis Club is helping charities involved in The Candis Big Give, log on to candis.co.uk/charity. This is where you can find out
more about each individual charity taking part in the initiative and the vital work being done to help people from all across the UK. You can also read about the
wonderful projects each charity is raising money for in this year’s Candis Big Give Christmas Challenge, as well as find out how you can help make these projects
happen. Any donation you make during the challenge week (5-9 December), will be doubled*. In addition,
every month throughout 2012 we will bring you an exclusive update on one of the projects that, together, we’ve helped make possible. You will find pictures and amazing stories from people who work for the charities and those
benefiting from them, including tales of the hospices caring for the terminally ill and medical research trials helping to find a cure for a variety of conditions. You’ll see how a subscription to
Candis Club helps to make a real difference to people’s lives.