Negotiate like a Girl


PositivelyWed’s Dina Eisenberg shares her secrets to working with the haggling bride


{For female wedding professionals but the guys might learn something too}


Are you tired of having brides ask you for a special deal, trying to renegotiate your rates? If you answered yes, then you’re like most wedding professionals who are bombarded by brides who want to haggle.


Yes, it’s frustrating to work so hard and still feel like you can barely make ends meet. Instead of getting angry at brides or the state of the economy, here are a few tips to turn your natural negotiation skills into an advantage for your wedding business.


First, let’s set the table before we chew on some new ideas. The only person you can control is yourself so these tips are meant to help you achieve a more workable mindset when you negotiate for your wedding services. Practice this friendlier approach consistently and you’ll notice that you gain more and better brides and have fun doing it. Reframe the Experience Most people don’t like negotiating. Women really don’t like it. Studies suggest that women feel more than two times more anxiety about negotiating than men and that 20% of women say they never negotiate at all. Why?


WedBiz Journal


Playing nice. I remember my mom telling me to play nice and knowing that meant I was supposed to share with everyone and not be bossy. How about you? That subtle societal message encouraged girls to value harmony and strong relationships over our own needs.


Doesn’t sound bad until you realize that mindset makes you less able to negotiate in your business. You may find yourself avoiding negotiations, waiting for the bride to say yes instead of asking for the sale yourself. Giving away your power entirely because you’d unconsciously rather be liked than paid.


When you expect your experiences as a negotiator to be hard, aggravating, slimy, useless, you set a negative prediction that your mind works hard to make true. So, let’s take a different approach that can leave you with a healthier bottom line and feeling happier.


Let’s reframe negotiation as a conversation where you and your bride share your goals and plot ways to meet most of them, including the goal to have a perfect wedding!


February 2011


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